A Political Arrangement
by QueenTigris
Summary: Hokage is just out of Naruto's reach, and to take that last step he must... marry Gaara? And since when does the ability to make babies-human or not-make you a girl? Naruto doesn't quite understand this, but he does know Gaara looks sexy in a dress. mpreg
1. Making the Arrangement

**A/N:** Don't ask me why, because I don't know why. Yes, I'm writing an mpreg. An mpreg! The bane of all logical fanfiction! What is wrong with me? Well, I had an urge. Yes, an urge. That's what it was. Because it makes me giggle.

Now first of all, to all of those who are curious or skeptical, I thank you for being willing to actually click on the link to my story to hear me out. This is partly crack. Partly parody. Partly humor. Partly drama. Partly romance. Partly porn. And mostly fluff. Yes, this story is for _fun_. Not only will I be poking fun at other mpreg stories, but I'll be (hopefully) writing it so as to give an example of exemplary nonsensical fiction. Yes, that's right, I'm writing an mpreg story far better than any before! Because-- dun Dun DUN-- it will make the most sense I can possibly make it make.

Yay for AP Biology and twisting everything I learned there!

By the way, please stuff yourself with sugar and/or caffeine before reading this, so as to better the experience.

And if you flame me, you'll just encourage me more. I like to be contrary like that.

**A Political Arrangement**

Chapter 1: Making Arrangements

* * *

It started right after Tsunade hit her third 60th (or so it was called) birthday

She had been inviting— Read: forcing— Naruto to attend Council meetings long before that, so Naruto entered the hall and sat in his usual corner prepared for another afternoon of doodling and daydreaming while resisting the childish— that's what Baa-chan called them the first couple times she had to lecture him— urges to retaliate against the discrete glares the Council members occasionally sent his way.

It wasn't until Tsunade had been talking for a while before he realized that nearly every Council member was sneering at him.

Straightening from his slump, Naruto glanced at the Hokage, and realized she was looking at him too— thankfully, with a much less hostile expression.

He blinked.

The deceptively genjutsu-ed blonde raised an eyebrow as silence descended in the musty meeting hall. "Well, Naruto?"

The younger let his face backslide into the familiar goofy grin, and he scratched his cheek, feeling the slightly raised markings there out of habit. "Uh... Well what?"

The change was instantaneous.

"Were you even listening, you brat!"

"Ow!"

It scared him sometimes, how that old hag could change so quickly from the kindly and eccentric woman he had named "grandmother" without knowing if the label fit or not, to the scary, murderous, _painful_ personification of rage that always reminded Naruto of the bathhouse women his sensei frequented.

As it turned out, Naruto had missed Tsunade's speech announcing her pending re-retirement, and her decision to name her successor.

Naruto had missed the words he'd been waiting for— no, striving for— for so many years. He had been named Rokudaime Hokage.

At first, Naruto sat through the rest of the meeting in a blind stupor, deaf to the angry protests of the Council. The Hokage's words didn't sink into his brain until he was out on the streets, automatically racing to his apartment, and he spent the next week struggling to believe it.

However, his life-long upward battle was far from over. The Council spent the next four months waging a vicious and relentless battle with the current Hokage. Tsunade met each argument with fortitude, but her intended retirement date was pushed steadily down the calendar, regardless.

* * *

Naruto was not present in the meeting hall when the Council came up with their most insane argument yet. Tsunade, in an attempt to prove her point to the Council, had started shackling him with administrative duties. He wasn't exactly sitting at the impressive oak desk in the Hokage suite, but he wasn't doing any of those stupid practice assignments he had sat through so many of with Shizune-chan peering over his shoulder, either.

His clones were almost done with all of the B-Level papers and about half-way through the A-Level ones all detailing the fine points of trade of non-military items with foreign shinobi villages when Tsunade barged in, bowling over one clone and making another _POOF_ out of existence as the door banged his rump with enough force to keep going and leave a dent in the wall.

"We need to talk." she said.

* * *

"What kind of stupid requirement is that'ttebayo!"

Tsunade sighed and rubbed her temples. "It _is_ law, actually. An old, unused, _obsolete_ law."

"They why does it matter, huh?"

"Well, it was in use rather recently, actually, if it was never actively acknowledged. After the death of the Yondaime, and then the Sandaime, however, people had other things to worry about."

Naruto sat down with a huff, but his foot kept tapping rapidly. "This is ridiculous!"

Tsunade gave him a look, saying she couldn't agree more.

They sat quietly for a moment, Naruto mumbling obscenities under his breath, and Tsunade glaring into the distance.

"So..." Tsunade tapped her desk. "Have anyone in mind?"

Naruto's head snapped up. "What the hell! Do you really expect me to get married on a whim because the Council pulled some stupid, old law out of their collective, over-stuffed asshole? Why don't you just go back to the meeting hall and kick them around 'til they concede like you always do? This is their stupidest argument yet!"

Tsunade slumped forward with a sigh, and Naruto felt slightly guilty for the dull exhaustion in her eyes. It had been a hard couple months fighting for him, he reminded himself, and the elaborate genjutsu Kyuubi let him see through when he turned and looked at her out of the corner of his eye let him see the emaciated, vulnerable woman she really was.

"Look brat," Naruto made a point of keeping quiet, he may call her hag, but Tsunade was one of the few he truly respected. "Age requirements, doubts of your skill and integrity— that kind of crap is arbitrary and easily argued away or circumvented with the right paperwork and the well-placed promise to the right political figure. However, the Hokage is not the main legislative body in Konoha, that's what the Council's for. I just sign the papers."

Naruto chewed his lip, going over the years of tutelage in the administrative arts he had received in his head. "Can't you veto? Or something?" He winced; he already knew the answer.

"The law's already in place," Tsunade shook her head, "and it's even harder to ask for a repeal. The majority of the Council is against you."

Naruto sniffed indignantly and scuffed the floor with his sandals.

A thought struck him.

"Hey, wait a minute! Does this mean you have to get married, too? According to this law, you can't be Hokage either!"

Tsunade gave him a small smile for catching the loophole. "That's what I told the Council. However, I get exempted from such requirements for being instated in a time of crisis."

Naruto frowned. "So, I really have to get married in order to be eligible for Hokage?" He fell back into his chair with a thump. "_Why_ is it even a law in the first place?"

The Hokage resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the whine. "Well, ever since Konoha was founded, Hokage has been one of the most trying jobs— and that leaves little time for other things— such as finding love." Tsunade ignored the raspberry the blonde blew at the ceiling. "The Hokage is the most powerful shinobi in the village— and Konoha would be losing a great potential asset if that very powerful shinobi forgot to procreate."

The older blonde was leveled with an unimpressed stare. Yes, Naruto knew what _procreate_ meant. Thanks to his sensei, he knew ever possible method of saying _sex_, including those portrayed with obscure hand signs and foreign languages. "I have to get married because they want me to have _kids_? I would have thought they wouldn't want to have any more Kyuubi brats running around." he snarled.

He instantly felt sorry as a painful emotion flashed in the Hokage's eyes. Even Kakashi-sensei still flinched at the mention of the demon.

"Naruto..."

"So, will you marry me, baa-chan?" he slipped easily behind the cheerful façade in hopes of lightening the mood after his slip up.

He didn't even bother to dodge the unnaturally powerful fist that connected with his face a split second later.

* * *

It was certainly a worrying dilemma. Naruto was used to overcoming obstacles with brute force and determination. However, this situation required a delicacy that he was loathe to admit may be his political undoing.

How could he get around this one? He was reluctant to dump his most recent problem on any of the girls he knew; he respected all of the ones he would even consider spending a day with— much less the rest of his life— too much to want to do that to them. If nothing else, Naruto was an idealist, and romance was one of those dreams he held close, right next to being Hokage. Besides, there weren't any girls he knew whom he felt he could provide the loving relationship they deserved.

He had gotten over Sakura years ago, and though he knew she would drop everything to help him achieve his dreams, he knew he could ask her. Their relationship had been painfully distant and cordial for years. Killing one's first crush, traitor or not, tended to put a damper on even the toughest friendships.

Then there was— well, he couldn't think of anyone. He knew girls, sure, but not any on the sort of personal terms this required. Naruto scowled down at his cooling ramen; he didn't need to be reminded of the pathetic state of his love life. It was kind of hard to find that special someone when not only were you busy almost constantly with political aspirations, but also when most potential mates hated you before they even met you.

"Pork. Small, please."

Naruto tensed at the concise words, and knew instantly to whom they belonged. He was smiling before he even turned to greet his sneaky little friend. "Oi! Are you ever going to get past the creep-and-pounce stage? You know we're way past that!"

It was a running joke between the two, even though the redhead never seemed to get it.

Gaara, as soon as he had gotten wind of the news, had rushed his entire sandy posse to Konoha to witness Naruto's swearing-in; only to discover the Council had postponed the ceremony. Again. And again. And again.

His presence was one thing to be thankful for, though the stoic redhead wasn't much for conversation, he was certainly a comfort at his side, silently and emotionlessly offering support in that ever-enigmatic Gaara-way as Naruto struggled through the final battle for his childhood dream.

"What did they say today?" Gaara's eyes narrowed, and Naruto took comfort in that the suspicious glare was not for him.

Gaara may have the social skills of a retarded rock, but Naruto always appreciated Gaara's ability to understand him without the help of words. No one else could decipher him that easily no matter how well they claimed they knew him. One needed to have lived through what the Jinchuuriki had to understand the labyrinthine personality of one, for no sympathetic mind was great enough to conjure what it was like. And Naruto always smiled at that, no matter how sad he really was.

"The Council pulled out a stupid, old law, and Baa-chan can't shoot it down this time. I have to get married to be eligible for Hokage."

Gaara frowned; and he glared at the small bowl of steaming broth as it was set in front of him.

Naruto gestured for his next helping as he continued. "Huh, and I would think they wouldn't want—" he stopped, remembering the reaction he had gotten from Tsunade in saying those words. Bitterness did not fit the ever-cheerful Uzumaki Naruto.

"—any more demon brats running around?" Gaara finished for him with a smirk.

Naruto smiled back ruefully.

The redhead nodded, shutting his eyes briefly. "There is also a law like that in my village."

Naruto stilled. Gaara was a secretive person, to be sure, but... could he really have missed something like that for so many years?! "You're not married are you?"

Gaara glared at him, berating him for his loudness. "No."

Naruto sighed in relief, he couldn't imagine Gaara with a wife to go home to, such a blow to his perceived reality might turn the entire thing upside down. Besides, he wasn't sure he could come to terms with the jealousy that flared in his chest at the notion that Gaara could have something that he didn't. Selfish though it was, some part of Naruto had gotten the idea that Gaara was constant that could be relied on, someone to stand companionably by his side when his life took a downward turn, and any change to that was a betrayal.

"The Suna Council decided the marriage requirement void due to the dire circumstances surrounding my instatement."

Nodding, Naruto added, "Same thing with Tsunade. Do you think any 'dire' circumstances are in Konoha's future?"

Gaara allowed Naruto to see the brief twinkle of amusement in his eyes. "Orochimaru is dead, his followers scattered to the four corners of the continent, Akatsuki is disbanded, and no inter-village hostilities have been posing a threat lately. The forecast looks relatively peaceful, I'm afraid."

"Too bad, I coulda used at least a cloud of political disturbance!" chuckled Naruto.

Gaara smirked. "Well, Cloud and Mist have seemed rather stormy lately, but the weatherman predicts the disturbance will dissipate when it reaches the Iwa mountain range."

Naruto laughed, turning to his new bowl of ramen as the metaphor was wrung dry. "Gaara, I think you were a weatherman in a previous life!" he grinned as he dug in.

He at the next two bowls with a feeling of peace, grateful for once that Gaara didn't talk much.

"...Do you have anyone in mind?"

The noodles being shoveled down Naruto's throat nearly choked him.

He scowled at the redhead once he had cleared his airway. "That's what Baa-chan asked."

Gaara cocked his head curiously, unwilling to let go of the question.

Naruto harrumphed and slammed his chopsticks down moodily. Did Gaara have to bring this back up just when he had managed to forget it enough to let the silly smile slip back onto his face? "No, there isn't anyone I have in mind! I haven't even _dated_ anyone in I-don't-know-how-long!"

Gaara raised his hairless brows as Naruto raised his voice. Naruto couldn't care less if the other restaurant patrons were glaring at them.

"What about that carrot-top from Iwa?"

Naruto drew in a breath, ready to go on a tirade as Gaara asked the question. He let it out in a whoosh. "I wasn't her type, apparently." Naruto frowned, Gaara had been told this already.

"The blonde from Rain?"

"Too high-strung."

"That brunette you met in Northern Fire country?"

"She smelled funny. And had crooked teeth."

"The redhead you met at the bathhouse."

"Which one?"

"Both."

"Gaara!" growled Naruto, "You already know all this!" It was their best kept secret, that Naruto told Gaara _everything_. It was much better to talk to a socially-retarded rock with good listening skills rather than the ceiling in his apartment, at least.

"... Sakura?"

"Sakura— well, _Sakura_..." Naruto sighed.

Gaara nodded at the blonde's dejected tone. "You have no one at all."

Naruto bristled at the painful words, even though they weren't meant to be.

Gaara was staring at him when he looked up; and Naruto frowned at the unfamiliar expression in his eyes.

"The Council says you must marry in order to ensure your genes live on in future generations." stated the redhead, as if summing up an argument.

"Yes..." Naruto was starting to get uneasy, that strange sparkle in those teal eyes foreshadowed disaster, he was sure.

"You don't need a wife, you need children."

"Well, wouldn't I need a wife for that? Gaara, I can't just pick up a kid of the street and call it reproduction."

Gaara's lips were slowly stretching into that scary half-crazed grin that still scared the shit out of Naruto.

"Um... you're not suggesting I knock up some random chick, are you? That's sick! And it'll probably cost me the nomination."

"That's not necessary."

Naruto glanced at the redhead askance. "Then what the hell are you grinning like that for? You look like you're planning some sort of evil, diabolical plot."

Naruto was almost sorry for the speed with which the grin disappeared, leaving Gaara looking almost apologetic.

"Uh... Shukaku?"

Gaara's fingers brushed his lips, as if to make sure the bloodthirsty grin was gone. He shook his head, whether to Naruto's question or in reprimanding the demon in his mind, he didn't know.

"Um... as I was saying, all you need is a... willing body that can produce your progeny."

Naruto turned slightly green at the clinical tone with which Gaara spoke. "Well... yeah, I guess, but not just _anyone_."

"And it would be ideal if this body happened to be of at least notable political stature." conceded Gaara.

Naruto had known this, but hadn't even bothered to consider it. His list of girls was short enough as it was.

"Did you know the biological definition of a female is: any individual of a species that produces eggs that can be fertilized by a male of the same species in order to create viable offspring? Thusly, provided the right equipment, even a genotypically male individual can be classified as female."

Naruto swallowed. He was about to try to lead the conversation off that topic with a comment about transvestites when he noticed the expectant gleam in Gaara's eye. One thing about Gaara, is he was more stubborn that Naruto was. Once he got something into his mind, he would not let go of it, no matter how much Naruto did not want to listen. "That's a bit of a stretch, don't you think?"

"I'm sure Hokage-sama would agree with me." he smirked. "After all, even a normal human male has at least one ovary, even if it is not functional."

Naruto took a deep breath, scanning their surroundings for a distraction with his peripheral vision. "Gaara—"

"Demonic chakra can achieve things even the greatest medic-nin would fall short on."

Their eyes locked, and Naruto knew he was serious. He could feel his skin paling.

With a new cloud of dread hanging over his head, Naruto paid for both their meals, sadly leaving half a bowl unfinished and Gaara's untouched; and he dragged the redhead out of the stall and down the street until he came across a suitable alleyway to duck into.

"Look, Gaara—" he started.

"The fact that I _can _do it is reason enough." Gaara interrupted uncharacteristically. "And if you ask, I'll say yes."

Running his hands through his hair anxiously, Naruto took a step back. There was an unspoken agreement between them, and that was to never bring up the _accident_. "Gaara, that night—"

"If nothing else, it proved the possibility! I can carry child, and maybe you can, too—"

"Gaara! If you're saying what I think you're saying—"

"—And that means," Gaara was staring up at him with an earnest urgency rarely seen in those cold jade eyes. "That I fulfill the requirements."

Naruto crossed his arms, suddenly feeling angry. "For what? A wife? The law requires marriage, and last time I checked, you need a _girl_ for that!"

Gaara growled at him, showing off two rows of sharp, white teeth that glistened in the shadowed alley. "That's what I've been saying this entire time!"

Naruto snorted. "What? That just because you're a freak of nature, that makes you a girl? I wouldn't expect that kind of stupid logic from you!"

Gaara recoiled, snarling at the words; but it was okay. Between them, they both knew it was like the pot calling the kettle black.

"Uzumaki," Naruto winced at the return to the aloof, formal tone. It had taken him years to wean Gaara off that. "I'm trying to give you an option here." Maybe he shouldn't have been so harsh, after all.

"We don't even know if what that thing was would have grown into anything, much less something passably human!" But the fire had been drained from his voice, as Gaara glared at him with ice he didn't remember hurting so much.

"Shukaku says that since it would be of our making, it would take the form we wished it to."

"Can you really trust what the demon says?!"

Gaara narrowed his eyes at him. "You were not the one who's—" he stopped, grasping for words. "...You cannot understand. I am the experienced one here, and I know Shukaku is not lying now." That was Gaara's way of saying, "Trust me."

Naruto looked down, and noticed that Gaara was clutching his stomach unconsciously. He remembered the spark he had felt there, and how he had destroyed it himself out of fear and shame of what he had done. "You really mean it, don't you." He shook his head at the craziness of it. Oh well, Gaara was known for that.

Gaara didn't even have to nod, it wasn't a question, but he answered regardless. "I am your friend and... you helped me achieve my happiness, so I would do anything to return the favor."

Naruto's eyes snapped up, and cerulean locked with determined teal. "That favor has long been voided. You don't owe me anything."

"I owe you everything." rebutted the redhead.

Naruto opened his mouth to protest this, but Gaara beat him to it.

"And... I want to do this."

The blonde's eyes bulged. "_Want _to? Has the Ichibi driven you crazy? You _want_ to throw away everything you've worked for just to be a _housewife_?"

Gaara shrugged one shoulder. "The Council instated me with the intent to make me a figurehead, anyway. It's a battle every step of the way just to be able to sign paperwork, and frankly, I'm tired of it."

Naruto stared suspiciously. "You'd leave Suna? Your siblings?"

In typical Gaara fashion, he gave a round-a-bout answer. "Villagers still mind to walk on the other side of the street whenever I walk about town, and besides, Temari spends most of her time here." Naruto wasn't sure he could trust Gaara's nonchalance.

"Kankurou?"

"He's first male born. Kazekage is his birthright anyway."

Naruto stared disbelievingly. "Goddamit, you're serious? Have you thought this through?"

Gaara glared at him, defying any more protests with his eyes.

Naruto chewed his lip pensively. Gaara did not make commitments lightly. If the redhead was willing to make this kind of proposal, then he was damn-well planning to go through with it. And... Naruto couldn't help but be drawn to the idea. Ever since he'd been old enough to like girls, he'd wanted one of his own to come home to. Gaara, of course, was far from a girl, no matter what he said. But he could still be a person to depend on for company every time he came home from a hard day. Naruto already liked the idea of having Gaara by his side— until death do them part. Selfish, it was, but he couldn't help but want to hold onto his friend. Gaara had been the best thing he'd had for years, especially after Sasuke's... death. "You... really want to?"

"I don't like to repeat myself." Gaara growled, and Naruto knew that if he expressed himself like a normal person he'd be howling in exasperation.

It probably wasn't the most rational decision he'd ever made; but having Gaara _and_ a chance at Hokage status was too much to pass up. He'd said the words practically before he came to the conclusion. "Will you marry me?"

Gaara blinked at him owlishly for a whole minute, more surprised that Naruto was.

"Sabaku no Gaara," repeated Naruto, "will you marry me?"

* * *

"Baa-chan! You better start preparing for the coronation now'ttebayo!" Naruto barged in yelling gleefully at the top of his lungs, dragging a bewildered redhead behind him.

"Naruto! You brat, what are you onto now?"

The blonde Jinchuuriki grinned at his elder, ignoring the dangerously pulsing vein in her forehead as usual. "I'm getting married!"

Tsunade choked and Shizune tripped with the pile of scrolls she was carrying. "What? W-when? Who!" The Hokage jumped out of her seat spluttering. She hadn't been expecting the blonde would actually go out and find a wife in the span of one afternoon!

Naruto thrust into the air the hand still wrapped around the pale wrist he hadn't let go of yet, nearly pulling the redhead attached to it off his feet in the process. "Baa-chan! Let me introduce you to my lovely fiancée, Gaara-chan!"

Gaara yanked his hand free and glared, annoyed by the feminine suffix.

"Kazekage-sama?!" Shizune seemed to be torn between frantically gathering the scolls she had dropped and frothing at the mouth.

Tsunade slapped her forehead. "Naruto! You idiot! You can't marry a guy!"

"No no no! You see, he's a girl!"

Tsunade stared at the blonde skeptically from between her fingers. She glanced at the redhead beside him whom was busy glaring at the floor. "I don't know what got that idea into your head, Naruto, but I can assure you that Gaara is male." She had serve as his physician from time to time, after all.

"No no no! Gaara, tell her what you said!"

Sighing, Gaara crossed his arms. "Yes, I'm male, but biologically I can also serve as female."

Tsunade blinked. If she had missed the fact that Gaara was transgender, she wasn't the medic-nin she always thought she was.

"Y'see, the demons do weird things like that!" Naruto gestured ecstatically.

"Due to the nature of inter-demon relationships," Gaara elaborated as Tsunade kept frowning in confusion. "Shukaku, the natural omega is..."

"The chick!"

Gaara sighed, sounding defeated. "Well, all demons have the ability to fulfill both biological roles..."

"But I'm more powerful so I get to wear the pants'ttebayo!"

The redhead glared briefly.

Tsunade sat back down slowly. "So..." She looked the redhead up and down. "How do you know you can... reproduce in that way?"

Gaara glanced at Naruto askance; the blonde looked very uncomfortable suddenly.

"Well, uh..." he scuffed his feet and scratched his cheek. "We've kinda... done it before."

Tsunade jumped up again, not sure whether she was appalled more by the scandal or the simple possibility. "You're not pregnant _now_ are you?"

The redhead blinked. "No... that was a long time ago. And we aborted immediately."

She glanced between the two of them, from Naruto's pensiveness to Gaara's unfazed expression. She felt out of the loop; Gaara and Narutos' friendship was a peaceful one that outsiders only glimpsed on the sidelines, and Tsunade had doubted from time to time that they were close at all. However, years of observing their interactions, regardless of how infrequently, had hinted at the deep relationship they kept so quiet. But she hadn't known they were _that_ close.

"You _really_ think you can pull of a marriage between two Jinchuuriki just to get a Kage position?"

"Yes," Gaara said simply. "All you need to do, as the current Hokage and a respected medic-nin, is sign the papers to back up the fact that I can bear offspring and therefore be classified as biologically female."

"Hmm..." hummed Tsunade. It was crazy enough she was tempted to try it. With Tsunade backing up Gaara's claim, they could circumvent all of the nasty laws against gay marriage. It was unorthodox, and would probably be met with resistance from the Council and villagers alike, but not impossible.

And if it worked, she'd be able to see Naruto fulfilling his dreams... and she could _finally_ relax like her aged body told her she should.

"You're sure there's no one else?"

Gaara scowled; and Naruto shook his head.

She chewed her lip, and tapped her nails on the desk, looking at Gaara. "You're sure that you can... ? You realize I'll need proof before I make the report, right?"

Naruto blinked and started fidgeting again. He probably hadn't thought of that. "What kind of proof?"

Gaara frowned. "I'm sure I could convince Shukaku to oblige an examination."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Right, well, in that case... what are your plans for juggling the Kazekage position?" That was the only real question she had left, bar the many, many medical ones the doctor in her was shaking in anticipation for.

"I'm retiring."

"Huh?" Naruto and Tsunade said in unison.

"Can't you work from here'ttebayo?"

"Who's going to fill the position? Some one has to run Suna!"

"We already went over this." Gaara growled at Naruto. As it had already been said, he didn't like having to repeat himself. "The Suna Council already runs the village on their own, they wouldn't notice— might be happy, even, if I were to step down."

Tsunade sighed softly. She had been discretely keeping an eye on the young Kage ever since his unexpected inauguration after the confusing times of the Sand-Sound invasion, and his administration had been riddled with bickering and blatant resistance to anything Gaara tried to do. Tsunade hadn't half the trouble he had, and she was still exhausted after only a couple years.

"I'm considering naming Kankurou my successor."

"Does that mean he has to get married, too?" Naruto scratched his head viciously, reeling from all the turnabouts the conversation had taken.

"That's a matter for later consideration."

"So, moving on, have you thought of the theme for the wedding yet?"

"Ramen!"

"Not food, _theme_, Naruto. White, perhaps? To keep it simple?"

"Orange!"

"No," Gaara shot that down with a glare. "Black and red."

"But it'd look like a funeral!"

"Precisely," Gaara smirked.

"If you can have black, I want orange!"

Tsunade groaned, rubbing the bridge of her nose. She was sure that the future held only headaches and frustrations for her. However, knowing Naruto, despite the pending disaster, he would miraculously end up on top, as usual.

* * *

**End Note:** I was going to put the wedding in here as well, but the chapter was getting so damn long, I decided to leave it off until the next.

Also, I'll be _trying_ to keep this T rated... but I'm really bad at censuring my own work. And it always irks me when writers leave out a chapter because it's too smutty. So, they're all like, "Hey! Hey! If you wanna read that missing part between Chapter 22 and 24, you gotta follow this link!" But you never know if they're leading you onto a porn site, or to the devil, or what!

And I'm like, "Well, if you can cut out a chapter like that, is it even necessary to the story? Porn is all well and good, but if it don't fit, it don't belong!"

And... well, yeah. /End Rant/ To make a long story short, rating may go up in later chapters ('cuz I like da sex).


	2. Begrudging the Ceremony

**A/N:** Yes! I am done with you, chapter two! This may seem a little rushed, as this story goes straight from the proposal to the very ceremony itself, but that's really the point. The boys are rushing into something they haven't quite realized the scope of yet, and it's not until it's over that they'll realize just exactly what they did.

**Dedication: **This chapter is dedicated to ednama! Without Ed, I wouldn't have had the substantial poke I needed to get me off my ass and upload this. (And also because she dedicated her most recent story to me, and that really touched me.)

**A Political Arrangement**

**Chapter 2: The Ceremony**

* * *

"This is so much fun!" Temari practically bubbled with joy and endless girly bounce. As she had for more than a week now, ever since Gaara had broken the news to her.

He had expected something more... well, less flouncy, and maybe a little more thundery, as was Temari's wont. However, the moment Gaara put "Naruto," and "wedding" in the same sentence, it seemed he had pressed that magical girl button. You know, the one that made the opposite sex squeal in fiendishly high pitches, coo over the supposedly adorable, and turn into scarily persuasive fashion gurus. Gaara didn't even know his sister had such a button.

Gaara was starting to wonder if the glee would ever wear off, before she stuck that way and drove him insane for the rest of his life. Even so, Temari was perhaps the only think keeping him out of the asylum, as his past week had been more than harrowing.

Before now, Gaara had never realized just how much _stuff_ went into planning a wedding. He had seen his sister's stress for himself, when she was planning the tying of her own knot with a certain lazy bastard (that Gaara still didn't like, simply because he was the reason Temari spent most of her time in Konoha, and not with her lonely little brother), but now that he was actually in her position, Gaara came to the conclusion that his brother-in-law had the right idea, weddings were just _troublesome_.

He couldn't believe it had only been a week since he had made his proposition to Naruto. With so many decisions, and paperwork, and questions, and all this _shopping_, even though his sister did a lot of it for him, that week felt like an eternity past.

"Temari!" he grunted, holding onto a convenient support beam for dear life. "I can't breathe!"

"Didn't you take your sand armor off?" His sister continued tugging enthusiastically, ignoring the choking sounds her little brother was making.

"Y-yes!"

"Well, then hold it _in_, for Kami's sake! There!" She gave it one last tug and tied off the knot. "Aww! You look so cute!"

Gaara coughed and scrabbled at the ribbons binding his chest. "I don't look _cute_! I look like a demented poof cake— and I can't breathe, damnit!"

"If you can talk, you can breathe! Did you gain weight or something? It fit fine a week ago!"

"I couldn't breathe then, either!" Gaara gave up with a huff, Temari had effectively trapped him in a cocoon of suffocating satin.

He glared at himself in the mirror, which tripled his glower and sent it back at him from three different directions. "I look ridiculous!"

"Nonsense! You look adorable! I'm sure Naruto will jump you on the spot, the second he catches sight of you!"

Gaara blanched. He still hadn't told his sister the exact _reason_ he had suddenly decided to marry his best friend. So of course, Temari, being the understanding big sister she was, had decided from the beginning that she would encourage her little brother's unorthodox relationship, no matter how unexpected it was. Gaara was sure he would appreciate the gesture if he and Naruto actually _were_... well... you know... but really, it just meant his sister was always saying very embarrassing things, even in public. Out loud.

Honestly, she could be proud of him if she liked, but Gaara wished she didn't have to yell it in the streets!

"Now, stay still, I'm almost done." Temari batted his hands down, which had risen to defend against her newest attack guised in the form of "prettying him up."

"No! I am _not_ wearing makeup!" However, previous Kazekage or not, Sabaku no Gaara stood no chance against his girl-power wielding sister.

"There! Just a little blush to give you some color!"

"Get off!" In a last ditch attempt, Gaara defiantly swatted the makeup out of Temari's hands and onto the floor.

"Gaara!" Temari reprimanded, waving her finger under his nose like an old matron, "Can't you be more cooperative? This is your big day! You should at least try to look nice for Naruto, ne?"

"I think it'd scare him more than anything if I walk down the aisle looking like a gay whore in a white dress." The redhead growled petulantly.

His sister sighed and shook her head.

"Yo! I came as fast as I— ho shit!"

Temari and Gaara turned to the door to find their middle sibling standing there, gaping like a fish.

"Wh-what the hell? Why is Gaara in a wedding dress?!"

"Kanky, didn't you read the letter? Gaara's getting married!"

The puppet-nin spluttered. "Yeah— but— I assumed it meath he was marrying a girl! Not that he _is_ the girl!"

Temari shook her head and tsked.

However, Gaara knew an escape route when he saw one. He jumped down from the ottoman Temari had placed him on, much like a doll on a podium, as she trussed him up, and ran to his brother. "C'mon, we're already late."

Kankurou squeaked as he was buffeted aside by voluminous skirts and yanked out the door by the fleeing redhead.

"Wait! Gaara! You need to put your shoes on! And Kankurou, your tux isn't straight!"

* * *

Naruto felt like he was living a dream. A really weird dream. As in the kind you got from eating stale ramen before falling asleep on the couch while watching late night TV.

The last week had been so surreal, he was wondering if he had imagined it all. He was _really_ going to be Hokage. After so many years and struggle and hope, he could finally say, "I _am_ Hokage!" Of course, that was a couple more hours into the future, after the inauguration and... the wedding.

It still didn't quite make sense to him, and frankly, he thought both Gaara and Tsunade must be nuts to think they could pull some technical bull crap out of their asses and call it truth. Because Gaara was _not_ a girl. He wasn't even close to one. But if it worked, Naruto supposed he couldn't argue. He was already looking forward to all the gender benders he could suggest in public to tick Gaara off. Being knocked around by a sand fist would be worth the amusement. His inner prankster was already giggling with delight over the havoc he could wreak on the perceptions of the foreign dignitaries.

Naruto stopped short of an evil snicker as the enormous oak doors at the other end of the hall burst open suddenly. The organist scrambled into the traditional wedding song as a crimson-topped bundle of satin ribbon and chiffon came barreling down the aisle, a paintless Kankurou in a ruffled tuxedo dragging behind.

Naruto's jaw dropped and he let loose an abrupt guffaw. Was that _Gaara_ in a _wedding dress_?

The white monstrosity halted suddenly at the sound, and Gaara went from glaring at the red carpet he was following, to snarling at the blonde from across the church.

Naruto couldn't help it. He dropped to the floor and rolled, howling with laughter.

Kankurou, now that he wasn't tripping over the laced and embroidered train behind Gaara, had the presence of mind to properly place Gaara's hand in his crooked elbow and lead them forward again.

The redhead let himself be led, somewhat red-faced and petulant since Naruto was still laughing at him. Kankurou grit his teeth, if it weren't so perturbing, considering it was _his_ little brother, whom was psychopath and Kazekage all in one, he didn't doubt he'd be howling along with Uzumaki.

Whispers followed them as they marched down the aisle, and Kankurou bristled as more than a few unfriendly words reached his ears. Curious villagers arched their necks to glimpse their passage, clan members scowled, and a few stoic ninja sat ramrod straight in the pews.

If it weren't for the fact that this was such an important event, with the inauguration starting right after the wedding vows, Kankurou didn't doubt the crowd would be far smaller. He turned his gaze forward, where a snickering blonde was just picking himself up off the floor obligingly as a robed Godaime kicked him in the ribs discretely.

Uzumaki Naruto. Truth be told, Kankurou wasn't all that surprised.

He just barely saved his little brother from falling on his face as he tripped over his dress on the way up the steps at the end of the aisle.

Naruto burst into a new fit of giggles, but was stopped abruptly with a pained yelp as the Hokage's heel came down on his toes.

Gaara snarled and nearly ripped the elaborately embroidered hem of his dress in picking it from underneath his feet so he could stomp the last few steps to the top of the dais.

Naruto was grinning, lips twitching in the effort to withhold another obnoxious guffaw, as Gaara stomped up to him, growling with teeth bared.

Kankurou quickly turned the forgotten veil over his little brother's face, which should have been done before they walked down the red carpet, to distract the redhead from leaping at the blonde and ripping his throat out.

"Will you, Kankurou, eldest brother of the bride's family," Tsunade started up immediately, catching onto the hostilities about to explode in front of a chapel full of people who didn't need to witness the blood splatter from an Sabaku Sousou. "allow the hand of your sister, Gaara, be given to this man in holy matrimony?"

Kankurou blanched at the use of the word "sister," and Naruto grinned at being called a man.

"Uh... I will?" He wasn't sure he was doing it right, as the ceremony was already out of order and he had missed the rehearsals while in between Suna and Konoha, but he figured he couldn't mess it up much more, anyway.

Apparently, it was acceptable, because Naruto reached out and took Gaara's hand from him, and Tsunade jerked her chin to the side, signaling Kankurou stand behind her.

Everyone jumped as the chapel doors slammed open again, this time admitting a whole train of people marching down the aisle.

Kankurou smirked as Temari came marching purposely down the red carpet, smiling as if nothing was out of place, and the rest of the bridal train trailing behind in leaf greens and feathery peaches.

He blinked.

No, he _wasn't_ hallucinating. That really _was_ Rock Lee and Maito Gai skipping behind his sister throwing petals onto the unlucky people sitting by the aisle. In horrid leaf-green tuxedoes.

Apparently, flower girls were very hard to come by on short notice.

Once she reached them, Temari forced the second more elaborate of the bouquets in her hands on an unwilling Gaara with a smile, but her eyes threatened death if he had opened his mouth to complain.

"Hey," Naruto spoke over the music being banged out on the organ behind them. "Weren't you guys supposed to go before Gaara?"

Tsunade glared at the continued interruption, but Temari replied with a false sweetness as she moved to stand behind Gaara as head bridesmaid. "Well, I guess Gaara-chan was so eager to get married to you, he couldn't wait!"

Gaara huffed indignantly, making the veil puff out from his face.

The Hokage cleared her throat over Naruto's snorts, "We are gathered here today," she began, projecting her voice across the hall, "to join two people in holy matrimony..."

Naruto swallowed harshly, as all his humor left him while Tsunade droned on with the traditional wedding speech. He suddenly felt like he was missing the irony, because there had to be _something_ here that was supposed to make sense. He had been so focused on being Hokage, he had almost forgotten about the ceremony that would precede it. Or, he had chosen to ignore it.

Now, standing on the dais with Gaara's hand in his own, and the words that would bind them together buzzing in the background, there was no way to ignore it.

Naruto, when he imagined his wedding day, had always placed the faceless girl of his dreams on the dais next to him, when he wasn't still entertaining thoughts of Sakura. However, Gaara may have been wearing the dress (and Naruto still had to find out how that particular absurdity had occurred), but he didn't have to be a genius to see that Gaara was quite obviously male.

It was purely political arrangement, Naruto realized sadly, and against his principles of living by the whims of his heart. He had, in his quest for Hokage, given up any prospect of romance, if only for the lifelong companionship of his best friend in return.

At least he hoped it would be lifelong. Even if the entire situation seemed obscene, Naruto couldn't bear to imagine any future breaking of their union. Their marriage was trivial at best, but was truly hardly more than an excuse to be closer. For years, Naruto had had to endure months, even years, without Gaara, and was always the sorrier for it, as he knew that if only he could keep his friend nearby they'd be all the better. Neither of the two, both ostracized and prejudiced against all their lives, were the type to let got of such a precious thing like a friend. It was with the desperate grip of the deprived with which they grasped each other, and held their tenuous, long-distance relationship together.

To Naruto, still young, brash, and untamed, romance was a thing of tomorrow, and that made Gaara all the more important. Therefore, losing Gaara seemed to him the worst case scenario.

Gripped by sudden anxiety, Naruto tried to catch Gaara's eye to reassure himself. However, the redhead's face was the loathsome shadow of a directionless stare. Naruto was quite sure he was grinding his teeth by the set of his jaw.

Gaara's hand was limp between his two larger ones, but Naruto was sure the slick sweat between their skin was not all his own. Gaara was at least as nervous as he was.

Naruto managed a small smile as Gaara's eyes finally jumped to his own when he squeezed his fingers gently. He felt at ease, as he was rewarded with a softening of the redhead's expression.

"...Do you, Uzumaki Naruto, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and health, until death do you part?"

"I do," he said automatically, surprised that he hadn't missed his cue, and relieved he'd been able to keep his face straight as the Hokage referred to the man in front of him as a woman. That would just never make sense, no matter how many times it was repeated.

The Hokage turned to the redhead. "Do you, Sabaku no Gaara, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband..." She repeated the same oath for him, and then it was time for Gaara to accept it.

There was a very long, pregnant silence.

People were leaning forward in the pews, wondering if Gaara's voice was too low to hear.

But he hadn't answered yet.

Naruto was gripped with a sudden fear, and he held Gaara's hand tight, hoping to get a reaction out of him.

The redhead's eyes were unfocused, still held within Naruto's own, and his lips were slightly parted as if he had forgotten to keep his facial muscles in order. It wasn't until Kankurou coughed loudly into his hand, interrupting the tense silence, that Gaara snapped awake. He gasped deeply, as if he hadn't been breathing, "I do," he said.

Naruto smiled, and Gaara finally squeezed back.

"I now pronounce you man and wife." Tsunade smirked. "You may kiss the bride."

"What! Do I have to?"

On the sidelines, Kankurou slapped his forehead in exasperation. This was the most messed up wedding he had ever attended. And he had already lived through his _older_ sister's.

"Brat! It's tradition!"

"But—"

"Just do it!"

Snickers and harsh whispers filled the pews as the scene played out.

"... But... he's a _he_!"

"Naruto!"

"She! Okay, whatever! I never said it!"

"Stop whining and kiss up, already!"

"But— but... what if he— I dunno, attacks me or something, I mean—"

Fed up with the nonsense, Gaara ripped the veil from his face with a frustrated growl. Suddenly, Naruto found his face to be much closer to the psycho redhead's than he ever considered safe.

"Shut up," Gaara tugged harder on the lapels of Naruto's tuxedo. "And do it."

The blonde swallowed. Nose to nose, Gaara's face was a white and black blur, but Naruto imagined that if he could see it properly it would be very scary. "Um... now?"

"Now!" howled the Jinchuuriki.

"Okay! Okay! Um..." Screwing his eyes up, Naruto tried to convince himself he was about to engage in saliva swapping with a very sexy redhead— a female one, of coarse!

Except Gaara refused to be anyone but Gaara in his mind's eye.

Out of sheer force of will, he managed to tilt forward.

The first brush of their lips was like a shock of electricity, and it all went downhill from there.

Not expecting the sensation, Gaara gasped, inadvertently opening his mouth for Naruto, who fell forward as Gaara bent backwards, the redhead's grip on the front of his tuxedo unyielding.

Naruto was forced to compensate for the shift in weight, lest the both fall. Out of instinct, he swung his arms around the unbalanced redhead and lifted.

Incidentally, this only completed the mistake Gaara had begun by opening his mouth.

Their mouths crushed together, with far more force than the feathery light brush Naruto had originally intended.

And in an attempt to make up for the original error of opening it, Gaara closed his mouth.

Naruto couldn't help the moan that bubbled up from his throat. Gaara's mouth had trapped his lower lip, and with Gaara's teeth grazing over the intrusion uncertainly, and the warm, wet cavern's natural suction, it felt _good_ on the sensitive skin.

Recognizing the noise for what it was, Gaara quickly opened his mouth again to release the captive flesh. However, the damage was already done.

Naruto, as has already been mentioned, was not exactly "well-practiced" in the act of romance, despite his tutelage under the notorious pervert hermit. The impulsive youth was unused to such pleasing sensations, and now that he'd had it, he wasn't quite ready to give it up again.

Gaara squeaked in surprise as his mouth was invaded again, this time intentionally. Naruto groaned as he explored the enticing expanse of Gaara's oral cavity; he lapped at the ridged roof of his mouth, slicked his tongue over his teeth, and prodded Gaara's tongue with his own, desperately trying to make the redhead repeat the titillating sensations.

As for Gaara, his eyes widened to the size of saucers as he realized what was going on. Naruto was _kissing him_. Not just the brusque, chaste kiss between friends in their awkward situation, but the make-out, demanding kind of kissing that Gaara observed every time his brother brought home a new girlfriend. He couldn't even begin to wrap his mind around it, because Naruto was _kissing_ him, and he had never imagined he would experience this particular sequence of events beyond his craziest dreams, and... well...

He liked it.

However, Gaara's enjoyment of the kiss was to be short-lived. As soon as he finally moved to tentatively reciprocate Naruto's ministrations, the blonde seemed to come to his senses.

They parted with a jerk.

Gaara blinked slowly, lips still parted, disoriented by the loss of sensation.

Naruto stared at the confused redhead, a vaguely horror-stricken look in his eyes.

"Eh-hem," Tsunade cleared her throat loudly, breaking the spell of silence that had fallen over the chapel during the Jinchuuriki's lip-lock.

Gaara startled, suddenly remembering that his world included more than just Naruto, and that they were practically onstage in front of all of Konoha.

Temari had both hands over her mouth, and was holding back either a giggle or a scream by her constipated expression.

Kankurou spoke for the rest of the chapel by looking just plain dumbfounded, with his mouth agape and a disbelieving stare.

In the front row, Kakashi coughed repeatedly to hide his perverted chuckles.

"Naruto?" Gaara wondered if he had done something wrong as the blonde continued to stare at him. "You can put me down now..."

Naruto snapped back to life, and dropped the redhead like a sack of potatoes. "S-sorry!"

Gaara nearly dropped the rest of the way when his feet hit the floor, but he managed to keep his balance using Naruto's lapels as leverage. He scowled down at the voluminous skirts encasing his legs. He had a new respect for women; to be able to walk in a hundred-kilo dress, much less in the high heels Gaara had managed to flee from before Temari forced them on him, they must have thighs of steel.

Gaara raised his eyes again; flinching inside as he found the same disbelieving cerulean. Naruto was still staring, and his skin had acquired an unhealthy pasty color. Gaara was afraid that, any moment now, that expression would turn to disgust. Why was he looking at him like that, anyway? It wasn't like Gaara was the one to stick his tongue down _his_ throat!

Feeling sorry— and sorry for being sorry— Gaara dropped his hands from Naruto's tuxedo.

Tsunade cleared her throat again, and Kakashi seemed to be having a rather violent fit, but that's all the sound their was in the still air of the Konoha chapel.

Then the clapping started.

Both Jinchuuriki turned to blink at the crowd as intermittent applause turned into the thunder of a rounding ovation, complete with catcalls and wolf whistles.

Smirking, Tsunade raised her hands to call for silence. "Well," she began once the noise had died down. "After that display of... passion, it is, unfortunately, not yet time to move on to festivities." On cue, the organist started playing a more majestic ballad. "It is time that I, the Godaime Hokage, must step down from my office. To replace, me, I have named my successor, whom I believe to possess the greatest will and ability hitherto seen in a Hokage, the Rokudaime Hokage, Uzumaki Naruto."

Apparently in a good mood now, the audience applauded this.

Tsunade turned to Naruto. "Uzumaki Naruto, will you serve Konoha to the best of your abilities, leading with integrity and strength so that Konohagakure no Sato may flourish?"

Naruto set his jaw and pushed the memory of the taste of Gaara's mouth from his mind. "Yes."

"As Hokage, will you lead the Hidden Village of the Leaf according to the constitution written by the Shodaime and strive to uphold the central values of Konoha?"

"Yes."

Tsunade smiled vaguely. "Uzumaki Naruto," she proclaimed, as two honorary attendants, namely, Iruka and Shizune, moved forward to wrap the traditional Hokage shroud around the blonde's shoulders. "Rokudaime Hokage, you are now the leader of Konohagakure no Sato. You are the motivation for our shinobi, the reassurance for our villagers, and the inspiration by which Konoha prospers. I, Godaime Hokage, now pass on the responsibility, so that you may continue the legacy of Konoha."

The hat marked by fire was placed on his head, and he turned to face the crowd in a daze.

The tears blurring his vision nearly spilled over as the applause rolled over him.

_Hokage_.

He raised his left hand, and silence fell. "I..." his voice trembled.

_Hokage_. He was here, after so many years. A mixture of joy and sorrow threatened to bubble up his throat.

So many battles fought.

So many sacrifices made.

_Sasuke... you bastard, not being here._

Then, hesitant warmth slid over his palm, squeezing gently.

Naruto glanced down, where small white fingers surrounded his thicker tan ones. Startled, his eyes jumped up to the redhead they belonged to. Gaara met his eyes shyly, looking pensive.

The newly made Hokage grinned as the seafoam eyes seemed to soften in his gaze. He squeezed back, rubbing his thumb briefly over Gaara's knuckles, as he turned back to the crowd.

"I, Uzumaki Naruto..." he started again, and this time his voice didn't falter. The words rolled off his tongue, ingrained in his memory by Tsunade's fists, and Shizune's chastisements, and hours of repeating them to himself into the night. Gaara didn't let go of his hand even after the last words of the inaugural speech left his mouth, and the crowd stood from their seats to cheer and clap.

In fact, Naruto wouldn't let him let go.

His grip was unyielding as he grinned his widest grin down the aisle; people reached out to pat his shoulders and tug at his hand, but Gaara's in his own was a solid reminder to keep smiling and shake each hand shoved at him with equal enthusiasm.

Despite the fact that the redhead was glaring at him by the time they reached the chapel doors, and was trying to discretely pull himself free.


	3. Avoiding the Crowds

**A/N:** Whew. I'm glad I got this together today. This is my last upload for NaruGaaNaru Day!

This took a bit longer to edit, because I decided to add an extra scene and ended up completely changing half of it. Whoever guesses what the new scene is gets an imaginary cookie!

Also, please pardon my horrible attempts at recreating drunken slurs.

**A Political Arrangement**

**Chapter Three: Avoiding the Crowds**

* * *

Gaara resisted the urge to groan as Naruto dragged him outside. He was married, Naruto was Hokage— and Gaara was _done_ with ceremonies and pleasantries. He had been planning to sneak off and get out of the horrid wedding dress at the first opportunity, but Naruto seemed keen on keeping him around.

And considering the same crowd that had witnessed the entire embarrassment was following them, Gaara couldn't risk attacking the clingy blonde in case he caused an incident.

And furthermore, much to the redhead's dismay, the grass was still wet. Despite the fact that it was past noon. Gaara scowled down at the springy carpet of green, and curled his bare toes uncomfortably. He hated getting his feet wet.

Naruto was still grinning as he stopped and turned in the middle of the church courtyard. Colorful streamers fluttered from the trees, long buffet tables of appetizers and treats lined the shadows, a raised platform supplied a smooth floor for dancing, and butterflies flitted between the flowers in the garden surrounding the yard.

Raising his free hand into the air, Naruto proclaimed, "Whoo! PAR-TAY!!"

Gaara sighed as the crowd replied with a cheer, and was soon swarming around them to fill the courtyard.

Gaara hated crowds.

He hated parties.

He hated wearing a dress with no shoes in the middle of said hated crowd during said hated party.

However, Gaara's internal hate-a-thon was interrupted as a familiar arm slid around his waist. The previous Kazekage lifted his eyes to scowl at the blonde invading his personal space bubble.

"Hey there, darling, for my wife, you're not looking happy enough'ttebayo!"

Gaara sighed and resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He would have replied with a properly scathing comment, had not the blonde's attention been stolen away first.

"Way to go, Naruto! I never knew you had it in you!"

Naruto turned as a hand clapped down on his shoulder, and he blinked at the masked jounin who was giving him the thumbs up. "Eh? Never had what?"

But the jounin ignored Naruto's confusion.

Gaara definitely didn't like that lecherous twinkle as Kakashi bent towards him.

"Eh heh! My, my, Naruto, you certainly have a good eye. I never would have imagined this little redhead was such a tasty little thing under all those Suna robes and sashes. Would you mind if I gave him a little kiss for good luck?"

Gaara's eyes widened in horror as the perverted jounin's hands reached for him. Despite the fact he was being manhandled, Gaara didn't mind as Naruto pulled him to his chest and turned, half-hiding him from the touchy-feely jounin. At least it was protection from the perversion of the Cyclops. Naruto's sensei was _creeeepy!_

"Oi! Keep your hands to yourself, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Aw, that's not fair! You're just being selfish!" whined Kakashi.

"And you're being a pervert!" An angry brunette appeared suddenly and swatted the masked jounin in the back of the head.

"Itai! Iru-koooiii..."

Gaara blinked as the chuunin turned to them and the thunderous rage on his face shifted into a giddy, tearful smile. Talk about a mood swing.

"Naruto! Congratulations! It was a beautiful wedding!"

With his ear pressed into the slightly abrasive cloth covering Naruto's chest, Gaara could hear his voice rumble under the surface as he laughed and replied, "Thanks, Iruka-sensei!"

The ex-Kazekage started slightly and studied the chuunin with new interest, not missing the faint scar marring his nose. Iruka was one of the "precious people" Naruto talked about _constantly_. However, Gaara had never actually met the man.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," the chuunin smiled and offered the redhead his hand. "Naruto talks about you so much; I feel like a already know you!"

Gaara blinked and looked up; Naruto scratched his head sheepishly. "Heh, Iruka-sensei!"

Gaara freed on of his arms to give the chuunin's hand an awkward shake, and the teacher melded back into the crowd after another "Congratulations, Naruto!"

After that, a constant stream of congratulations, handshakes, and shoulder pats seemed to flow past them. By the second, Gaara's hand was sore and he was tired of saying "thank you." Taking advantage of Naruto's clinginess, he retreated deeper into the embrace of the blonde's arm. That way, people stopped trying to shake his hand as he appeared to be much too busy snuggling. Who knew Naruto could prove useful in a crowd? If Naruto had been around when he was Kazekage, he could have just had him shake all those hands and go through all those so-called pleasantries for him!

Gaara was drifting off into a pleasant daydream featuring the joys of quiet and solitude when he felt Naruto tense. A tense shinobi was an uncomfortable shinobi. Or, an uncomfortable Gaara, as Naruto was now holding him much too tightly.

"Naruto,"

Gaara turned, his cheek brushing against the dry cotton of Naruto's tuxedo, to observe the source of the blonde's anxiety.

"Sakura," Naruto was smiling, but his voice exuded the strain of that expression.

Gaara glared at the pink-haired kunoichi. Years of listening to Naruto's stories of her character had not left the redhead with a complimentary view of the woman, despite the fact that Naruto held her in the highest regard.

"Congratulations on becoming Hokage. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks, Sakura,"

Gaara was glad the "-chan" had been dropped years ago. It was painful enough watching these two interact, trying to be nice to each other.

Sakura glanced at him briefly, but quickly averted her eyes from the redhead's intense glower. "So," her lips twisted as if to smile, but it looked false. "How long have you two been together?"

Gaara blinked, and opened his mouth to reply with a curt, "Never," but the last of his breath left his lungs in a silent yelp as both Naruto's arms squished him against the blonde's unyielding ribcage.

Breathless, Gaara realized the deep, ominous rumbling in his ear was in fact the sound of Naruto's laughter as it bubbled up from his chest cavity. "Well," vibrated Naruto's ribcage, "A long time, if you know what I mean." Gaara looked up in time to see the blonde wink suggestively.

Why on earth would he lie about that? Gaara had been under the impression that Naruto wanted to keep their relationship purely platonic, despite their marriage (and the... accident at the altar), much less advertise the fact that they had a relationship at all. Which they didn't. They were Friends, as Naruto had defined it for him years ago, and Gaara was happy with that.

"O-oh," Sakura looked surprised; and from the devilish glint in Naruto's eyes, he was pleased with this. "I didn't even know!"

"Hee hee! Yeah, nobody did, really!" Naruto lowered his voice conspiratorially. "Gaara's a little shy, y'see."

Gaara glared. He so was _not_. Sabaku no Gaara was the furthest thing from shy!

"Oh, I see!" the pink kunoichi giggled. "That's so cute!"

Cute!? He so was _NOT_.

But Naruto distracted him before he could express just how uncute he was— preferably through violent means— by sliding two fingers under his chin.

Gaara's growl died in his throat and was reborn a purr, as Naruto's fingertips caressed the soft, sensitive skin under his jaw.

Damn him.

He should have never trusted Naruto with that secret.

But... ah, that felt n_iii_ce...

"Hee hee! I know, right? You'd be so surprised, it's like he's a completely different person in private! Like a kitten!"

Sakura gasped. "No!"

"Oh, yes! He may seem all scary glares and murderous intent, but behind closed doors— heh! heh!—he's a total cuddle bunny!"

Naruto's fingers slid around his mandible, behind his ear, and scratched there. _Ahh..._

"I knew it!" Temari's voice joined the girlish giggles and melodramatic gasps that had been growing in number as Naruto spun his tale. "I always figured he was a sweetheart on the inside!"

Gaara could hear the new gossip spreading away from them. By tomorrow, there wouldn't be a girl in Konoha that took him seriously. However, his mind was preoccupied with restraining himself from begging for more as Naruto continued to rub and scratch all the right places on his head and neck.

He was going to kill the trickster. After he stopped petting him, of course.

"Aw! Look how cute they are!"

"Who's top, Naruto?"

"Baka! It's obvious! Which one is _not_ in a dress?!"

"Does Gaara like it rough, Hokage-sama?"

Naruto was chuckling uncomfortably by this point. "Eh, ladies, ladies! Let's keep the conversation in the comfort zone, ne?"

"What's Gaara's biggest kink, Hokage-sama?"

"Do you make him wear dresses in bed, too, Hokage-sama?"

"Naruto, have you ever considered contributing a chapter to the Icha Icha Letters edition?"

"Back off, Kakashi-sensei!"

And then Naruto's hand stilled.

Gaara's eyes snapped open.

The crowd of yaoi fangirls— plus Kakashi— quieted as the adorable redhead in Naruto's arms went from contented purring to murderous growling.

Gaara was going to kill the stupid blonde Jinchuuriki. Hokage or not, husband or not, friend or not, he was going to die. In the most painful way possible.

Then, everyone around them started giggling. _Giggling._

No one giggled at Sabaku no Gaara!

"Aw! Little Gaawa-sama is angwy!"

"He's mad because Hokage-sama isn't petting him anymore!"

"Poor Gaara-sama! He just wants to be petted!"

And then, the scariest thing Gaara had ever experienced occurred. He was a ninja feared by most who met him on the battle field, and the container of a crazy, blood-lusting demon to boot, but this trumped all of that.

The girls swarmed them.

Their squeaky voices grated on his ears and their grabby hands were everywhere.

They were invading his personal space bubble.

It was horrible.

But... _ahh_... that felt nice...

He couldn't help it, it was his ultimate weakness. Gaara purred and leaned into the many hands petting his hair, letting Naruto's arm around his waist keep him from falling over backwards.

"Aww..." the crowd of rabid women cooed.

"Okay! Okay! That's enough now!"

The petting stopped, and Gaara opened his eyes to realize the ground was much farther away than it had been a moment ago. Gaara gulped nervously as he realized the only thing supporting him was Naruto's hands on his hips.

"Gaara's gotta go now!" The redhead squeaked as Naruto swung them around, and started plowing through the crowd, still holding the ex-Kage aloft. "Excuse me! Hokage coming through!"

Breathing deeply to calm himself, Gaara wrapped his hands around Naruto's wrists, and stayed very still. If that idiot dropped him, Gaara would kill him.

"Aww! Gaara-sama! Stay a little while!"

"Come back, Hokage-sama!"

Finally, they reached the edge of the swarm, and Gaara grabbed at Naruto's shoulders as he slid down into a more comfortable and less lofty position against the blonde's chest. Naruto started running.

Over Naruto's shoulder, Gaara could see as the crowd of colorful gowns waved and whined, some still giggling insanely. He shuddered and held on tighter.

Naruto was panting when he finally set Gaara down in a secluded courtyard tucked away in the maze-like gardens surrounding the church.

"Kami," Naruto pushed the hair back from his forehead. "Sorry about that, I wasn't expecting them to attack."

Gaara, disoriented from being carried like a rag doll by the fleeing blonde, stumbled to the nearest bench as soon as he was released.

Naruto groaned as he plopped down on the flat stone beside him. "Ugh, I've been on my feet for _hours_."

Gaara scowled up at the blonde. He had no shoes, and was wearing a ridiculous mass of heavy satin— in _public_; Naruto didn't have the right to complain to him!

"Oi, oi, Gaara, did you gain weight? Carrying you was like lugging Lee around with all his weights!"

Gaara snarled. He was at a perfectly healthy weight, thank you very much! How _dare_ that idiot imply that Sabaku no Gaara was _fat_!

"Just kidding! Just kidding!" Naruto chuckled nervously and waved his hands palm outward in a peaceful gesture. Gaara could be so touchy sometimes!

Suspicious teal narrowed as Gaara scrutinized the blonde.

Naruto breathed a sigh of relief as Gaara looked away, satisfied that the insult was hollow.

Gaara studied the rose bushes surrounding their courtyard coolly, and Naruto watched him, searching his face for the hidden emotions that Gaara so rarely showed.

He smiled thinly as Gaara's gaze snapped back to him. The redhead's expression was read easily enough, "What are you staring at?"

"So, ah..."

Gaara rolled his eyes. "Don't you have some things to explain?"

Naruto blinked, clearly bemused. "Eh... don't you?"

Sighing, Gaara deigned to jog his memory. "Why did you tell that pink-haired think we were a couple?"

Naruto corrected him with a scowl, as he often had to do repeatedly whenever Haruno Sakura came up in conversation between them. "For the millionth time, it is not 'that pink-haired thing,' it's _Sakura_. Be nice. And..." Naruto scratched his cheek, changing his expression to abashed. "_Aren't_ we... a couple? I mean, we _did_ just get married..."

Gaara crossed his arms and started tapping his foot in annoyance. "You know what I mean," he glared wordlessly.

"Eh... heh, heh," Naruto laughed nervously. "I mean, well... we _are_... I guess? I mean— we're not like— _you know_, obviously, but uh... to everyone else we gotta be... you know?"

Gaara raised an eyebrow. It was a good thing he was significantly more intelligent than the blonde, or Naruto's babble would have made not sense to him whatsoever. "You mean we should give the appearance of being romantically involved? For the sake of appearances?"

"Uhh... yeah!"

Gaara rolled his eyes. "I can't argue that that isn't a bad idea. The more credible we look, the less ammo the Konoha Council has. Plus, the public already appears welcoming to us as a couple." Gaara frowned, remembering the enthusiastic applause after their... kiss. "However," he sighed, and fixed the blonde with a scathing look. "It would do you well not to lie to me, Uzumaki."

Naruto blanched. "Eh... what? I'm not lying'ttebayo!"

Gaara shook his head. "Naruto, I know you too well. You weren't thinking of the political ramifications when you... discussed our relationship with those women. You were trying to get to that pink monstrosity."

"It's _Sakura_!"

Gaara glared. "I don't know if you're trying to make her jealous, or what, and frankly, I don't care. But Naruto, you have to get over her if you want this to work."

"I _am_ over her!" scowled Naruto. "Even if she _was_ interested in me, I wouldn't care!"

The redhead looked skeptical. "Really."

"Really! You don't believe me?"

Sighing, Gaara looked away, and scuffed his feet on the courtyard slate. "Naruto..."

The blonde huffed, crossed his arms, and turned his gaze as far from Gaara he could within the limitations of the flexibility of his neck.

"I know you believe everything can be fixed with enough perseverance... but this is something that requires time. You both need to forget about each other for a while, until all the bad things between you seem less significant, and then maybe you could be friends again."

Naruto turned enough to scrutinize the redhead out of the corner of his eye. "Who are you, and what have you done with Gaara?"

The ex-Kage blinked. "Pardon?"

"Since when have you been an expert on relationships, huh?"

"Oh," blushing, Gaara admitted, "Actually, most of that was Temari's words. She used to complain to me about Shikamaru all the time."

Naruto turned back to his redheaded friend with a smirk. "I knew it! You little imposter, for a moment you had me fooled that the student had surpassed the teacher! You are still socially inept, right?"

"What teacher? And— I am not inept!"

"Aw!" Naruto threw an arm around his shoulders and not for the first time that day, Gaara found his face crushed to the blonde's chest. "My little student, you've grown so much! I'll teach you how to make friends yet!" Naruto's hand rubbed the top of Gaara's head, but too roughly for his taste.

Sometimes, even Sabaku no Gaara could not understand the unorthodox thought processes of Uzumaki Naruto.

"What are you babbling about now?" He had to push with all his might to unstuck his face from the blonde's breast bone. "And I'm not calling you sensei!"

Pouting childishly, Naruto released his captive, but the mischievous twinkle in his eyes remained. "That's okay, Gaara-chan, I won't mind as long as you call me sama!"

Brow twitching, Gaara fixed the Hokage with a glare. "I will address you with the respect you deserve— and!" Naruto found a pointy pale finger jabbed painfully into his left pectoral. "_Stop_ calling me Gaara-chan! I—" Poke! "—will—" Poke! "—not—" Owww... "—put up with it anymore! It's not funny!"

Naruto laughed. "Ow, ow, ow, ow! Okay! Okay! Jeez, your fingers are like kunai!"

Gaara harrumphed and abated his poking, satisfied with his victory.

Naruto's chuckles quieted, and he sighed. He leaned back on his hands, a perilous position on the narrow bench, and kicked at the grass growing between the slate beneath their feet.

Silence descended, and Gaara breathed deeply, savoring the flowery garden air, so different from the arid Suna wind.

"Hey, Gaara?"

"Hm."

"What happened at the altar..."

Gaara turned to face Naruto, noticing the familiar pensive expression with a raised brow.

"I, uhh..."

"Don't be sorry." Gaara smirked.

The blonde looked at him, surprised.

"If we're going to be a couple, a believable one at least, then we should at least try to look like it."

Naruto smiled vaguely and scratched his cheek, tracing the marks there. "Heh, yeah, I guess..."

"Of course," smirked Gaara.

"Smug bastard..."

Gaara snarled as he heard Naruto's mumbled aside. "I can hear you!"

"Eh? I didn't say anything!"

However, before Gaara could get beyond rolling his eyes to attack the foolish blonde, they were interrupted.

"AHA!!"

The Jinchuuriki jumped— Naruto to his feet, and Gaara spun in his seat.

"E-ero-sennin! How long have you been there!?"

The Toad Sannin, burped making Gaara wince as the scent of alcohol met his nose, and fell over with the force of his flatulence, rolling onto his back like a rolly-polly— his limbs in the air and flailing.

"I knew it! Ah knew it all along!"

"Eh... ero-sennin?" Naruto tip-toed to the fallen Sannin, leery of the way he was rolling back and forth like an overturned turtle.

"YOU'RE NOT GAY!"

Naruto jumped back with an "eep," and Gaara flinched, eyes widening, as the Sannin suddenly leapt to his feet, a righteous finger jabbing the heavens with his exclamation.

Then he fell on his face.

Gaara caught the Hokage's eyes briefly, the other simply shrugged with a sardonic twist to his mouth.

"Ero-sennin? Are you okay?"

"OKAY!?" The Sannin flopped onto his back. "You really had me going there, brat! I really thought you two were fo' real!"

Naruto's eyes widened, and he glanced at Gaara. Had their façade been broken so soon?

"There I wazzzz, drinkin' my mis'ry 'way..." He waved his fingers at the sky vaguely. "Thinkin' I had failed you. I tried to teach you the wond'rs of wemen, but then you off an go fo' ah GUY."

Naruto's eyes crinkled, trying to understand his sensei's words through the drunken slur.

The Sannin laughed. "BUT!" He jabbed his finger at the sky, missing his intended target of Naruto's face. "I stum'le on you two— an what do Ah find? You 're ah buncha LIARS!"

Naruto hunched his shoulders, and gave Gaara a sheepish look.

"Fix it," Gaara glared back.

"Uh, ero-sennin, I don't know what you're talking about. Gaara and I—"

"HA!" Jiraiya waved his finger in the air, still trying to get his aim right. "Don' try me! Ah heard juu talkin'!"

"Uh... you must have heard wrong. 'Cuz Gaara and I... are in love. Totally'ttebayo."

The Sannin laughed, and lumbered to his feet. "Oh? You can't fool me! Ah know da truth!"

"It's true!"

Gaara nodded along.

"Then prove it!"

Naruto blanched, and shared a look with his bride. "Um... you saw us at the ceremony, didn't you? We kissed. That means we're in love'ttebayo! What more do you need?"

"Pah!" Jiraiya slapped his knee, apparently finding this hilarious. "You— you— kissed? You're ah buncha idiots! What kinda crap 're ya tryin' to pull?"

"It's not crap'ttebayo!"

"Are you saying that you don't approve of our relationship?"

Naruto and Jiraiya paused, to give the impressive owner of that cold voice their attention. Too bad the impressiveness was lost on the fact that he was wearing a wedding dress. Jiraiya renewed his guffaws.

Both feeling awkward, but trying not to show it, Naruto and Gaara joined hands. "Uh... yeah'ttebayo! You shouldn't make fun of us! We love each other!"

Jiraiya was on his back again, this time rolling with laughter. "Love each other!"

Naruto bristled. "Hey! That's not nice!"

"Ah can't beliefe this!"

Naruto and Gaara shared a look. The Hokage leaned down to whisper in the ex-Kage's ear. "He usually doesn't remember anything once he gets this drunk."

Gaara nodded. They had failed their objective, aborting was the only possible solution.

Jiraiya was wiping his tears from his eyes when he realized that the two objects of his humor were in the process of dashing behind the bushes. "Hey! Come back, you brats! I still haven' told you— that Tsunade wants 'ta talk 'ta ya!" He then burst into a new fit of knee-slapping guffaws.

"Are you sure he will forget everything?"

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, it happens all the time. He'll pass out, and forget everything that happened the night before."

"That's not very... why is he a Sannin again?"

Naruto chuckled, and scratched his head. "Uh, well... he knows some cool jutsus?"

"Oh, yes," Gaara rolled his eyes. "That reminds me. How the hell did _you_ become Hokage?"

"Hey!"

"There you are! You love birds, you!"

The Jinchuuriki froze, and turned to realize they had crossed paths with Temari, along with the gaggle of girls in the ominous mass behind her.

"You're going to cause a scandal! Running off alone together during your own wedding party!"

"Oh... hey, Temari, we were just—"

"Oh, Naruto-nii, you can call be nee-chan!" The blonde practically skipped her way over to them. "What have you two been up to, hm?" Her eyes scrutinized them both, searching for ruffled hair, a piece of clothing askew, anything she could tell the rest of the girls waiting behind. "Hmph, nothing much, I see." She scowled disapprovingly, before clasping her hands before her and hopping on one foot gleefully. "But look how _cute_ you two are! Holding hands like a brand new couple!"

Startled, Naruto and Gaara glanced down to find that they were, indeed, holding hands. They had forgotten.

Naruto blushed, and released his grip, as Gaara's fingers tightened.

Looking up, the Hokage found the redhead giving him a pleading look. A furtive glance at his sister, and Naruto knew what he meant.

"Um, sorry, Temari,"

"Nee-chan!"

"Um... Temari... nee-chan, but we've gotta go."

"Oh! Wait, wait, wait!" The woman waved her hands. "I've got something for you, Gaara!"

The ex-Kage's eyes widened, and he tugged on Naruto's hand. This wasn't good.

Temari procured a pair of white stilettos, lips edged with lace that matched Gaara's dress. "You forgot these!"

"Eh?" Naruto glanced between the shoes and the boy now frantically pulling on his arm. "You're not wearing any shoes?"

"The Godaime wants to see us!" Gaara burst out suddenly. There was _no way_ he would wear those monstrosities. It was bad enough with the dress, but he at least deserved to be able to _walk_. Jiraiya's parting comment came in handy now.

"She does?" Naruto blinked. "Oh— oh _yeah_, she does!" He waved at Temari. "And you know how she doesn't like to wait!"

"But it won't take long—"

"Too bad, gotta go, bye!" Gaara finally succeeded in getting Naruto's hulking mass to _move_, and they set off at a trot away from the girls and his crazy sister.

"But— Wait! Aren't you uncomfortable going barefoot? Gaara!"

Gaara didn't care. Wet feet were better than tripping on his face every time.

And through it all, they had forgotten again that they were still linked by their hands.


	4. Finding Each Other

**A/N:** Happy NaruGaa Valentines!

**A Political Arrangement**

**Chapter Four: Finding Each Other  
**

* * *

Tsunade didn't appear too angry when they found her waiting by the bar. In fact she seemed perfectly calm... which was more unnerving since it was so rare.

"There you two are!" The previous Hokage greeted them with a welcoming smile, swirling her glass of sake expertly.

"Uh... hey, baa-chan."

Breath being short, having done all that escaping in a heavy wedding dress that constricted his lung capacity, Gaara used Naruto's closest arm as support.

"So... you wanted us?"

"Oh!" Tsunade lifted her cup so fast, Naruto and Gaara recoiled in fear that its contents would splash them. "I was going to... ask you... something..."

It quickly became obvious that the Hokage was at least mildly tipsy.

"And your question is... ?" Gaara prompted.

"I was going to..." she slurred, "Oh yes! Do you prefer— hic!— doggy style, or— hic!— missionary position?"

"What!?"

Gaara blinked. "What is she talking about?"

"Y'see... I have this bet going..."

"Our sex life is not to be betted on!" Naruto thundered, with accusatory finger in the air, and most definitely very close to starting one of his angry rants.

Eyes widening, Gaara's mind finally connected with the meaning of the previous Hokage's inquiry. "Missionary position."

Stopping suddenly, Naruto looked at Gaara with wide eyes.

"Damn!" Tsunade slapped the table hard enough to leave a dent. "I should have known!"

Scowling at the now disappointed kage, Naruto turned and pushed Gaara ahead of him to lead him away.

"Naruto?"

"I can't believe her! Betting on us like that—"

"What's missionary position?"

Blinking, Naruto came to an astonished stop. "You mean you don't know?"

"Well... doggy style I know, because Kankurou is always bragging it is his favorite, but I'm not sure what the other one is."

"Ah..." Naruto nodded. "Missionary position, it's... ah... wh-when the guy's on top of the g-girl, and... ah..." He scratched his cheek and lowered his voice, realizing there were more than a few people within earshot. "The girl's on her back, and the guy pretty much... ah... lies between her legs, y'know?" His voice was squeaky from embarrassment by the time he finished.

"Oh," Gaara recognized the description. "I didn't know it had a name— that's what we did, missionary position?"

Naruto squeaked. "Uh— well— that.... uh... back then was a... uh— improvised version, yeah."

Gaara nodded. "Yes, I understand, now. It seems I answered correctly according to my assumptions. I do prefer that over doggy style."

"Uh... do you, now?" Naruto continued to squeak, feeling out of his depth. Sometimes, Gaara's ability to discuss such embarrassing topics in such clinical tones seriously perturbed him.

"Yes, I'd rather be looking at your face than the floor."

"O-oh..."

"If that's the case, what do you think of doing it sideways?"

"Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto whirled. "How long have you been there?"

The jounin's single eye crinkled. "Long enough to know your wife doesn't know what missionary position is. Honestly, Naruto, what kind of bedroom have you been keeping?"

"A good one! Thank you very much'ttebayo!"

"Oh? Is that so, Gaara-chan?"

Gaara sidled closer to Naruto; Kakashi was giving him that creepy look again. "Well," he glanced up, where Naruto was giving him an expectant glare. "I suppose..."

"I suppose?" Naruto exploded. "What do you mean, 'I suppose?'"

Gaara bit his lip in chagrin. More than just Kakashi were now looking their way with raised eyebrows, and Gaara realized he was doing a rather poor job at pretending to be Naruto's lover.

Knowing it was time to start trying harder, he racked his brains for memories of what he had seen of lovers. He came up with a lot of his sister and her lazy husband, blocked the images of Kankurou and his constant stream of girlfriends, and recalled a lot of movie scenes— none of which were very helpful, but he decided it couldn't hurt to try.

Naruto quieted instantly as he found Gaara's body pressed against him, his eyes widening at this unexpected turn of events.

Standing on tiptoe, Gaara's lips brushed Naruto's as he spoke with his best impersonation of the 'come hither' voice. "It seems I've forgotten— what you can do."

Naruto shivered, easily mesmerized by Gaara's heated look, unable to even blink.

"You'll have to show me all over again."

Overwhelmed by the proximity and the suggestion in Gaara's look— act though it may be, Naruto did the only thing he could think to do.

Gaara's eyes widened in surprise as his mouth was invaded unexpectedly. Again.

Naruto's arms wrapped around the startled redhead, and crushed him to his chest, effectively holding him captive.

Letting his head fall back under the force of Naruto's mouth, Gaara willed himself not to bite as Naruto's tongue aggressively explored him. Out of the corner of his eye, Gaara could see that more than a few eyes were directed their way, now— good, it seemed their performance was working.

But then the unexpected happened— albeit, for the second time— and Gaara gasped, stiffening as warm fingers found the soft flesh under his jaw. Shukaku purred in the back of his mind, melting into a sandy pile of mush at the caress, and took Gaara with him.

Naruto must have noticed the silent plea for more as Gaara pressed harder against him and tilted his head to give his fingers more access. With an animalistic rumble, Naruto switched from stuffing his tongue down Gaara's throat to lapping at the sensitive skin that had been bared to him.

In that moment, while one of his most sensitive areas was licked, nibbled, and sucked, Gaara realized several things. One: Shukaku moaned like a whore. Two: It was not as easy to control his own body as he thought it was. And three: He would not kill Naruto for this, even though he was sure under any less pleasurable circumstances he would have for such a public display. In fact, he might kill him if he never did it again.

"A_hem_!" Someone cleared their throat for the third time, with enough blatant disapproval to break through Gaara's suddenly hazy mind.

Naruto looked up from a pale shoulder to glare at the interruption. He pulled his lips back to display the sharp fangs he had gripping Gaara's delicate skin gently. "Mine!" he growled around Gaara's flesh.

"Uh... yes, of course." Iruka blinked. "No one's trying to... take your wife from you, Naruto." Kakashi sniggered behind him.

Gaara turned his head slowly to look at them, blinking as if coming out of a trance. He swallowed, willing his body to cool down, and told a complaining sand demon to find another corner of his mind to masturbate in.

"Naruto," he tugged on the tufts of blonde hair he had grabbed in his pleasure. "save it for tonight."

Naruto growled, a needy rumble punctuated by the tightening of his jaws over the junction between Gaara's neck and shoulder.

Biting his lip, Gaara willed himself not to enjoy the hot brush of Naruto's breath over his bruised, moistened skin.

He tugged harder. "_Later_," this was no place for such things.

Finally catching the point, Naruto detached his maw.

"Now, put me _down_." Gaara had to say a minute later, as Naruto did not seemed inclined to release him any further.

The abrupt drop jarred Gaara's teeth, as he found that somewhere along the way his balance had become wobbly.

Giving the pouting blonde an annoyed glare, Gaara made a not to himself to talk to the boy later about proper manhandling etiquette. And honestly, while his enthusiasm was commendable, they were only trying to fake romance, not a porn show— that would also have to be discussed.

"Well, um— anyway, Naruto, Gaara,"

The redhead turned to the blushing Academy teacher. "Do you need something?"

"Uh— well, I was just wondering... when are you planning on starting the toasts?"

Gaara blinked. "Ah yes, we're supposed to do that, aren't we?" He turned. "Naruto?" He startled when he realized how close the blonde was. With an annoyed grimace, he pushed gently on Naruto's breastbone until the boy was a full arm's length away. "Shall we?"

Naruto's eyes flashed over the crowd, watching them watching him, before grinning as he settled his gaze on Gaara. "Well! I'm starving!"

An arm hooked Gaara by the waist, forcing him to fall into step with the blonde. "Aren't you, Gaara?"

Looking up at the smiling blonde suspiciously, Gaara couldn't help but feel that something had changed, though what it was, he could not decipher. "I... suppose."

Naruto's smile remained obnoxiously wide as he guided the redhead to stand beside him among the round tables in the dining area.

Holding his glass aloft, Naruto addressed the many Konohans watching them patiently from their seats. "Oi! We're gonna start the toastings now, so listen up!"

Gaara suppressed a shiver as a hand slid down his spine. He would definitely have to have that talk with Naruto soon. Granted, Gaara, having always received the short end of the stick when it came to physical affection, craved the sensations just like Naruto. However, having Naruto's hands constantly wandering over his body was starting to make him twitchy, and it didn't help that Shukaku was trying to convince him to... do inappropriate things.

Gaara looked up with a raised brow when Naruto failed to continue.

"Eh... Gaara?" Naruto leaned in to whisper. "What am I supposed to say for the toasting?"

"Toasts, Naruto, not toasting."

He scowled at being corrected.

"And you're supposed to say your vows, I believe."

"My vows?" Naruto's eyebrows came together. "What vows?"

Gaara rolled his eyes. He should have expected something like this from Naruto. "Your wedding vows? And perhaps an inspirational speech as Hokage?"

"Wedding vows... wedding vows..." Naruto rubbed his chin. "Nope, don't got none of those."

"Don't _have any_ of—"

"Yeah, yeah! Don't have any whatever'ttebayo!"

Gaara sighed. "Are you telling me you don't have anything prepared?"

Naruto scratched his cheek. "Uh... Am I supposed to?"

Gaara rubbed at the bridge of his nose, willing away the oncoming headache.

By this point, the crowd was filled with murmurs as they became restless. Sighing in resignation, Gaara realized he would have to pick up the slack. "Fine, I'll start— you follow my example." The crowd obediently fell silent as Gaara tapped his glass.

He paused.

And realized he didn't have anything prepared either.

Shukaku snickered and supplied his own incredibly offensive words, which Gaara promptly ignored. He decided to improvise, a task he was not new to after years as Kazekage with a Council that constantly tried to catch him off guard. "Many of you here may be skeptical or perturbed by our union made today," the words flowed easily, even though Gaara wasn't entirely sure where they were taking him. "And... I do not blame you. I suppose, we do make a rather peculiar couple."

Pausing, Gaara felt strong fingers slide over his own, squeezing gently. Having not realized how tense he had become, he was surprised when he felt himself relax with Naruto's reciprocation of the comfort the redhead had given him at the altar. "However... we hope that you will all be able to accept us in time." Gaara turned slightly so that he could see Naruto, remembering all the sappy things Temari and Shikamaru had said about each other during their toasts. He wracked his brain for something similar to say about Naruto. "We... never expected to... go public like this. I'm sure we must appear very pompous, to choose such an extravagant time to reveal our relationship." Might as well go along with Naruto's lie that they had been together for longer— it was, at the very least, useful.

Naruto's hand had gotten bored with Gaara's fingers, and was now caressing his way up his arm. They would be talking— very soon, because Gaara did not appreciate the distraction when he was trying to talk.

"However..." Gaara twitched, trying not to pull away from the tickling brush of his fingertips. "I don't think any other time could have been better." He turned back to the crowd, his voice gaining strength as he finally found a direction for his speech. "No longer will we have to hide, to pretend," oh, the irony— Shukaku was quick to point it out. "to run— We can face the world as we are— together. There is no better way to lead in life than to give yourself to it entirely... as we have to each other." Gaara blushed lightly as the combination of Naruto's caresses and Shukaku's comments was hard to ignore. "Just as a flower struggles in the shadows, so have we. But in the open sunlight it can flourish and make the world more beautiful as it blooms— and so we will, so that Konoha, too, may benefit." He paused, gathering the words for his next point.

The smattering of applause made him blink— he hadn't even finished yet!

"Yeah! That was a good speech, ne?" Waving his glass, Naruto waved his glass, encouraging the clapping into a thundering. It quieted shortly after, as he gestured for quiet. "Anyway, I'd have to say that Gaara's much better with words than I am."

He glanced at the scowling redhead, gracing him with a friendly grin. "But he certainly knows how to make everything sound pretty, ne? I don't know if I can follow something like that, I'd just sound dumb compared to him— her— whatever!"

A smattering of chuckles bubbled from the crowd.

"So, ah..." he glanced at Gaara again, before giving the audience an even wider grin than before. "Gaara looks good, yeah?"

An answer of screeches from the girls, and an occasional wolf whistle from else where made Gaara blush. Konohans were crazy.

"Yeah! Pretty sexy in white, isn't he'ttebayo?" Naruto laughed, and pulled in the glaring redhead. "And he's— I mean she's— all mine!"

Gaara looked up with a lidded gaze. He got the impression Naruto didn't know what he was doing.

"Anyway, uh..." the blonde continued to bumble, scratching his cheek in his nervousness. "I guess Gaara said it already, that, uh... y'know, how cool it is to finally come out in the open."

Both Jinchuuriki blinked as that received several cheers.

"But, ah... what he didn't say was... how happy I am that he's here. I mean, it's cool hat I've got my little sex kitten to come home to—"

Gaara glared as the crowd burbled with girl's giggles.

"—but what I'm really glad I have is my best friend."

Blinking, Gaara glanced up at the blonde. He had never been told he was the _best_. He wondered if it was true, or just part of the act.

But Naruto smiled at him, and those cerulean orbs told him it was true.

Blushing, and not quite understanding why, Gaara averted his eyes.

"I feel like I've robbed Suna of their Kazekage," Naruto continued. "But, heh, even if I wanted to, I don't think I could have stopped Gaara once he got this whole idea into his head."

Since when had Gaara been the sole initiator of this? It was Naruto wit hall the enthusiasm!

"And... um, not to jinx it or anything, and as I'm sure you noticed— Konoha's doing pretty damn good!"

Enthusiastic affirmatives were yelled, and ninja nodded.

"Well," Naruto's chest swelled, and his voice imitated the growing pride in his expression. "It's about to get better'ttebayo!"

Gaara closed his eyes briefly, avoiding the image of Naruto's fingers, in the shape of the victory 'V,' thrust into the air. He shouldn't have expected Naruto to be able to maintain a dignified appearance for more than five minutes.

"That's right! I'm the best Hokage that ever lived! And with Gaara and me, there's no stopping Konoha!"

He shouldn't have expected Naruto to suddenly acquire humility with the Hokage shroud either.

The redhead peeked his eyes open to see Naruto had jumped onto the table beside him, was pumping his fist in the air, and yelling at the top of his lungs.

Oh, Kami.

And to think, he was married to this guy. Why had he thought this was good idea, again?

Gaara sighed, as Naruto used his superior mass to haul the ex-Kazekage up beside him. He secretly applauded himself for not going into a murderous rage at being handled so roughly, as he patiently let Naruto pull him closer. And in an amazing display of restraint, he only so much as twitched as Naruto's hand landed on his behind. There may have been at least five layers of chiffon and satin between them, but Gaara could feel the weight of Naruto's hand there like the weight of the sun in Wind country. And Gaara's pale posterior did not take well to sunlight.

It didn't help that Shukaku found this hilariously entertaining, and would not shut up with his highly inappropriate suggestions.

Gaara was slowly counting down from ten, trying to convince himself it was an anger control exercise, and not a count down to Naruto's death, when Naruto bent and surprised him with a kiss.

Again.

With the crowd hooting and cheering up a frenzy in the distant background, Gaara suddenly forgot why he had been thinking this was all such a bad idea.

* * *

The party went on all afternoon and late into the evening, much to Gaara's annoyance. Naruto, however, was perfectly at home among the crowds, and his grin seemed to grow wider as the time passed. The alcohol he was consuming in small, but constant amounts may have contributed to this.

By the time the crowd had slimmed to the select, and the last of the drunken partiers had passed out or been escorted home, the moon had been out for a long time.

Naruto, having spent the majority of the late evening leaning heavily on Gaara's shoulder in an intoxicated haze, turned to whisper in his ear, "It's full tonight." when he noticed Gaara's eyes were trained on the sky.

Gaara wasn't sure whether to smile or shudder at such a statement. Full moons were a double-edged sword for him— they were beautiful, but also agitated Shukaku. Even Naruto professed to feeling the hypnotic call to his inner 'nature' when the moon was at its brightest. Gaara theorized that most Jinchuuriki felt it to at least some degree.

"A beautiful day... a beautiful night... a beautiful wife..." Naruto went on, breathing stale sake on his neck.

Gaara wasn't sure he'd ever be comfortable with that title. He could care less when other people said it— he wasn't the sort to be affected by labels— but it felt entirely different when Naruto said it. He had been Naruto's Friend for years, but now he found himself loaded down with the expectations of his new status. The physical affection he could handle— the hugging, the groping, even the kissing (which, he had to admit, was not all that unpleasant)— but it was the emotional undertones that had Sabaku no Gaara reeling. Naruto was an affectionate guy, and even before the ring was on his finger Gaara had experienced the random hug or spontaneous pat. However, now that that was an expected thing, he had access to a level of emotional connection had had absolutely no preparation for.

He should have seen the flaw in his deception plan from the very beginning— Naruto was a good actor, but only because he happened to possess an unnatural talent for looking happy in any situation, no matter how upset he was. Gaara was surprised he was doing so well appearing to be in love with him, since he had thought such a complicated act was beyond the blonde's skill. It could mean one of two things: either Naruto was a better actor than he had thought, or there was some truth in his affections.

Gaara was both afraid, and strangely enthralled by the latter possibility. Naruto had always been special for him— being the first to see the boy inside the monster, and reach past murderous shell to find the wounded child inside. It couldn't hurt, he felt, in light of their new-found union, that they could share a little intimacy— he had long pondered on such a possibility ever since the night that ignited new life in his belly.

For the umpteenth time that night, Naruto pressed his lips to Gaara's shoulder, sighing blissfully. The ex-Kazekage had to bite his lip to keep himself from shaking the blonde off, as the two other people sitting at their table sighed— one with a "So cute!" the other with a mumbled "Troublesome..."

Gaara cast his eyes over the sparse midnight crowd, wondering if he could sneak off without alerting anyone to his absence.

"So, when's the honeymoon?"

Blinking, the redhead shifted his focus back to his sister, who had been peppering their conversation with discomforting questions while swirling red wine in her glass all night.

"We haven't got the time for one." he answered with a sigh. He had long ago resigned himself to satisfying Temari's curiosity, if only to stop her from taking matters into her own hands. The last thing he needed was his sister prying into their relationship beyond questioning.

"Haven't got the time! But it's your _honeymoon_!"

Naruto pressed a grin to his neck, his weight nearly pushing Gaara off his chair. "I've got all the _honey_ I need, right here... under the _moooon_." He slurred ridiculously.

Gaara rolled his eyes as his sister giggled.

Shikamaru, bound to his chair by Temari's will, sighed and spoke up for the first time in a long time. "Speaking of post-nuptial traditions... why are you two still here? Don't you have _other_ things to do?"

Despite himself, Gaara flushed. It wasn't due to the sexual implication, but the penetrating intelligence in the genius's eyes that made him wonder— if he _knew_.

"Shikamaru!" The shadow-nin earned a whap on the head from his wife— but even Gaara could tell it was a playful and painless gesture.

"What kind of things?" Naruto lifted his head to blink dumbly.

Shikamaru and Temari stared, and Gaara dropped his head in embarrassment. And to be _married_ to such a...

"Oooh!" Temari was grinning mischievously all of a sudden, and Gaara's stomach tipped at the foreboding expression. She leaned forward to whisper— though Gaara had to wonder why that was necessary, since there was no one around to hear them anyway. "Are you pretending to be virgins? That's so romantic!"

That threw Gaara for a loop. What in the hell was _romantic_ about— nevermind, he didn't want to know. "No, Naruto's just drunk."

"Am noo-oot."

"And stupid."

"Hey!" But Naruto's retaliation was no more than a pout before he tiredly collapsed against his shoulder again.

Shikamaru snorted, rolling his eyes as he shifted on his elbows. "Well, it's easy to see who holds the leash in that relationship."

Temari hid an un-lady-like guffaw behind her hand.

Gaara had to think for a moment why that should be funny, before Shukaku graciously supplied him with an image— an image he was entirely unprepared for.

Naruto's hand pressed against his knee, and his breath brushed over his ear. "Do you like that idea? Ne? Gaara-chan?"

His heart nearly stopped at the possibility that Naruto had read his thoughts. There was no way he had the awareness and power of inference, especially in his current state, to make that sort of connection.

"Well, Gaara, are you going to dance with him or what?"

He blinked as his sister spoke. He had missed something, he thought.

"C'mooooon— I wanna dance'ttebayo!"

"I don't—" But he was already being pulled from his seat, and the dance floor was but a couple steps away.

They had already danced once that night— the traditional opening dance. Naruto had been unable to stop giggling the entire time, and Gaara's toes still smarted from that particular experience. Dancing with an inebriated Naruto, he imagined, would be even less fun.

The band, perhaps seeing their approach, segued from a trotting caprice to a slow waltz. That, in the least, was a blessing, since he didn't need Naruto tripping over his feet more frequently than three beats to the meter.

Predictably, Naruto was sloppy. Instead of the proper hold, he pulled Gaara into an embrace, and rocked them both to the music.

Gaara sighed, and let himself relax with only an air of resignation— one he had held almost the entire night. It wasn't all that much of an uncomfortable experience, however, despite his discontented expression. Naruto was a warm shelter from the cool night breezes, and a few minutes of periodic motion in the moonlit courtyard found Gaara leaning into Naruto's shoulder with eyelids drooping.

At length, Naruto turned his face into Gaara's hair; his hot sake breath heating his ear. "I like this." he whispered.

Gaara hummed in reply, lulled into passivity.

"I like having you."

Eyebrow raised, Gaara looked up for clarification. Naruto grinned at him blurrily, not offering any further explanation, and perhaps missing Gaara's inquisitive cue entirely. Then— he kissed him. It was slower and gentler than any previous, which had been tinged by a rough urgency, so Gaara saw it coming in time to dodge it. He did not, however, and welcomed Naruto's lips— something which the disorienting surprise and unyielding force of the last had not given him an opportunity to do. He could not deny the pleasurable addictiveness of it. Naruto, he had long ago decided, was a person he trusted implicitly. To be held so by such a person gave Gaara a feeling of a very comfortable intimacy— a sensation so uncommon in his life that it was very quickly becoming precious.

Humming happily, "You're mine now." as they parted, Naruto watched him with a warm, albeit drunkenly glazed, gaze. "Right, Gaara-chan?"

Understanding the context, but not the meaning, Gaara lifted one hand from Naruto's shoulder to wave it between them. "As far as this will make me."

Naruto squinted at the metal band that winked in the moonlight, and, in a hazardously uncoordinated move, clasped that hand in his own. He grinned as the matching gold shackling their fingers clacked together.

As their eyes met again, he said, "I, too, belong. Belong to you."

Gaara understood the message then, and smiled as well. Neither of them would be alone anymore, and they had learned long ago that was more precious than whatever they had given up to get there. "We belong, maybe not elsewhere, but together."

"Yeah'ttebayo..." Naruto swayed against the music, taking Gaara with him. "Until death do us... um... dattebayo."


	5. Getting Acquainted

**A/N:** I feel so bad for taking so long with this. It's been technically finished for a while, but I knew it needed a lot of editing, so I just couldn't round up the energy to really get down to it... It came out really nicely, once I did, however, and I'm rather pleased with this addition. Now I just have to get around to typing up all the other chapters lying around in the lonely obscurity of my notebook... and they're not all just for APA. Thanks for the patience, returning readers!

**Taiyaki:** This is a super yummy japanese snack, made from two fish-shaped waffles with bean paste filling the in-between space, and are usually eaten hot (even though Naruto doesn't seem to care). If you ever get the chance, I do suggest trying it. And don't forget to play with them-- they're shaped like fish for a reason!

**A Political Arrangement**

**Chapter Five:** Getting Acquainted

* * *

Naruto woke with panic bubbling in the base of his skull, an instinctual prodding that catapulted him into the waking world.

It didn't take him long to figure out why.

His mouth was dry— one of the few hangover symptoms he ever woke up with, thanks to his demonic metabolism, and he could smell the lingering alcohol on his body. He had been drinking. It was hardly a perilous occurrence— generally, he was an amiable drunk. The problem came, however, just like with any other in his situation— from the quantity. What separated him from any other, although, was that when he got too drunk, a slew of increasingly demonic instincts were released.

Even so, that didn't necessarily mean Naruto suddenly went Kyuubi with that one-too-many. That was the beauty of the Fourth's seal— even with consciousness compromised, it took care of restraining the demon within for him. It wasn't entirely effective, of course, so by that point, the demon's more subtle influences would take effect. That was all that was needed to make Naruto a danger to those in his immediate surroundings, unfortunately.

Naruto didn't drink often, but even when he did, few noticed a change in his temperament as his blood-alcohol level rose, so for a time he had been mostly oblivious to its effects on him.

That changed, however, when another demon was added into the mix.

Nothing in his surroundings served to soothe Naruto's nerves. He was in his bedroom, unchanged for years, and alone, but that was no consolation.

Because he could smell him. Everywhere.

He was on his pillow, in his sheets, on his skin— Gaara had undoubtedly been in contact with all of them.

It wouldn't have been the first time this had happened— weddings, it seemed were occasions where both Jinchuuriki allowed the consumption of alcohol to go relatively unmonitored, and Gaara's sister's only a few years before had been no exception. Naruto's memory was fuzzy on that night, but the morning after could be vividly recalled.

In jumping out of bed, Naruto's feet found another disconcerting clue. He tripped over folds of satin and chiffon, increasing his speed towards the exit for knowing what it was.

"Gaara!" His call as he stumbled into the hall was desperate, and more than a little scared. "Gaara! Where are you?"

It was a small apartment, and it was only a couple steps until he reached the living room, where he encountered his target staring back at him silently over the back of the futon couch.

Gaara blinked at him slowly, before rising, shutting and discarding the book in his hands along the way. With an awkward tilt to his head that Naruto had learned to decipher as uncertainty, he stated, "Good morning."

Naruto slid to a stop, astonished because Gaara never said anything without truth. He was dressed in Naruto's clothes, he was quick to notice, his sweatpants and an old T-shirt looming large on the redhead's slighter frame.

Gaara started fiddling with his hem, noticing the path of his eyes. "I... couldn't wear that dress any longer, and all my things are still in the Hokage's tower." he explained, hoping he hadn't made a mistake by helping himself to— what was now his husband's— things.

Naruto just nodded mutely, straining to remember if it had been his hands which had unlaced those white ribbons— but he came up blank. "Gaara..." he took a cautious step towards him. He _looked_ alright, albeit rather nervous for someone of Gaara's stoicism, but he couldn't really tell from across the room.

He let Naruto approach, a questioning look in his innocent eyes. He startled slightly when he felt Naruto's fingertips brush his abdomen. "What are you doing?"

Years ago, lying beside this same body, Naruto had felt the spark— a tiny burst of brand new chakra, nestled inside the center of Gaara's being, where human and demon energies intermixed— and instinct had let him know immediately what it was, and that it was part of him, too.

But now, even after slipping his hand under the loose shirt, and pressing his palm to Gaara's warm skin to make sure, only the calm pulse of Gaara and the dizzy swirl of Shukaku's energy greeted him.

Naruto breathed a sigh of relief.

Meanwhile, Gaara was giving him an increasingly irked look. "Naruto, what are you doing?"

All worries dissipated, Naruto grinned. "Just making sure. For a moment there, I— hey, what happened last night, anyway?"

"You don't remember?" Blinking, Gaara shrugged. "You were drunk, I brought you here."

"That's all? Heh! And I was worried over nothing!"

"Well..." Gaara was blushing.

Naruto froze. "Well what? I didn't— did I—" His fear came back— had he hurt Gaara after all? Again?

"We kissed." Gaara's eyes slid to the side, breaking eye contact. "For... a while. But then you fell asleep."

The shy flush crossing the redhead's nose brought back fuzzy images to Naruto's mind— images that came along with some very pleasing sensations.

"Are you... alright?" He had to ask. "Did I... hurt you at all?"

Surprise briefly flashed in Gaara's eyes. "It didn't hurt... it felt— good."

Naruto finally relaxed. "Good."

Gaara's averted gaze traveled from the far wall to the hand still pressing against the soft skin of his belly.

Remembering it, Naruto retracted the offending appendage with a jerk.

Gaara's gaze was blank when it returned to Naruto's face— a cold apprehension shivered to life in Naruto's middle, as a lack of expression from Gaara usually meant something was hiding in the redhead's unpredictable psyche. "You were looking for your seed."

Naruto shuddered at the metaphor, assaulted by the image of Gaara being ripped apart by a vicious weed growing from his middle.

"You do realize that is our purpose?"

"Huh?"

"Our goal? The entire reason we are wearing these—" Gaara indicated the gold band on his ring finger. "Remember?"

Naruto swallowed heavily, looking down at his own ringed hand. The thought still repulsed him. Gaara's pained look as they regarded each other that morning after Temari's wedding still haunted his most shameful nightmares.

He had lost control completely— and his best friend had paid the price for it. And if Naruto had not intervened, that price would have grown to a size unknown.

"Naruto?" Gaara's tentative palm on his pectoral repelled him— he had not realized he was wearing nothing but boxer shorts, and the unexpectedly intimate contact surprised him.

"We— we don't _have_ to—"

Gaara gave him the Look.

"Do we?"

"Naruto." sighed Gaara.

"But— I mean— I'm Hokage now, so we've accomplished everything we needed to. Why would we have to go any farther? I'm not wiling to take that risk'ttebayo!"

Gaara was giving him a disappointed look. "Well— if you don't want to... But after a certain period the Council will have the power to separate us, and force you into an arranged marriage with someone of assured fertility— and they will keep doing that until at least one child is produced."

Naruto's chest constricted in sudden fear. "They can do that?"

"Of course they can." Gaara gave him the Look again. "It's the second article in the law that caused us to get married in the first place— didn't you read it?"

"Well— I—" Naruto suddenly realized his predicament— he had a choice of getting Gaara pregnant with an unnatural demon child, or losing him to a forced divorce. And even after only a day in holy matrimony, Naruto had grown even less willing to give Gaara up. That didn't make his first choice any more appealing, however.

"Then again," Gaara turned away suddenly, and Naruto detected that familiar loneliness in his voice and the set of his shoulders. "if your only intention was to become Hokage... then you do have it, and there is little the council can do to take that away from you now. If that was my only purpose to you, then you have no reason to go to the pains of creating a family with me."

"Gaara—"

"You needn't wait for the Council, you know. You can file for divorce any time you like, and I'll soon be replaced by a more suitable substitute—"

"No!" Naruto spun him around so fast, he could hear Gaara's neck snap. "I don't _want_ anyone else! You're MINE!"

Gaara's eyes were wide, and Naruto forced himself to pause, knowing that his eyes were shining a very angry red by the way his lengthening fangs were pricking his lips. After a breath, he said more calmly, "Gaara... I have no intention of losing you. I have every intention, in fact, of keeping you. That vow stuff from yesterday? All that 'until death' stuff? That was a promise. And I keep my promises'ttebayo!"

Mouth opening wordlessly, Gaara stared. The surprise in his eyes, Naruto knew, was over the discovery of such devotion. Even between them, Gaara still needed to be reminded that he could be loved. "I—" he bit his lip, teal orbs taking in Naruto's earnest expression, savoring the intensity of emotion the blonde was feeling, marked by the awakening of Kyuubi in his eyes. "keep my promises, too, remember."

Naruto's lips turned up in a natural grin as all the tension drained out of him. "Yeah." Being reminded that their relationship went two ways— a quality so often lacking in Naruto's other relations, evoked a feeling of elation. Pulling Gaara closer was reflex, and the redhead fitted so nicely against him, Naruto was tempted to hold him there forever. "Huh— this is a little easier without the dress!" Naruto chuckled.

He could feel Gaara's eyebrows rise, forehead to forehead as they were. "One would think I would be the first to say that."

"Yeah. Dattebayo!" Naruto laughed, stroking Gaara's back— a motion he had seen, but never experienced, but imagined felt very nice. The subtle curve of Gaara's spine was not unpleasant under his hand, at least, even through the thin material of his shirt.

The timid brush of Gaara's fingertip on his cheek slowed that motion, however. Gaara accepted just about any level of physicality Naruto threw at him, but allowed little else, since he was in fact completely unused— and therefore uncomfortable— with anything more intimate than a handshake. Allowing Naruto to do as he pleased out of trust was one thing, but initiating contact himself was entirely another.

So it was with quiet awe, half-afraid that a sudden movement would scare away the curious redhead like a loud noise would a doe, that Naruto let his probing fingers explore his face. They did not go far, tracing his whisker marks before what might be the softest of palms cupped his cheek.

"Why haven't you kissed me yet?"

"Huh?" Naruto jerked, pulling his attention away from the mesmerizing caress. "Well— um— there's no one here to see."

Naruto felt the hand drop from his face with a sense of loss.

"Is that all it was for? A show? You could barely keep your lips off me yesterday, and here I am, at your disposal, and you haven't even the fancy? And what were those drunken gropings last night, then? Did your inebriated mind mistake your bedroom for an audience? Or was it just an alcohol-induced mistake like you claim the last time to be?"

Naruto winced. Gaara's expression was harsh, but his eyes screamed the confusion of the lost and forsaken child he had once been. He had been selfish to think he was the only one craving their intimacy— Gaara was deprived as he was, perhaps more so. "I'm sorry. I didn't think— well... I didn't think you'd want me to."

"Isn't that what spouses do?" Gaara's voice was more plea that question by that point— and Naruto realized he had not qualms about fulfilling that request. Just a day before, and he might have been galled by the thought of kissing another of the same sex— but this wasn't just some guy, this was Gaara. And somehow, that made a big difference.

"Yeah, and that's what we are, huh?"

Gaara quieted, waiting so see whether Naruto agreed with him or not.

"You like kissing, huh?"

The redhead nodded with a slight blush.

"Good."

And without further ado, Naruto swooped in to close the deal.

They kissed for what was perhaps the umpteenth time, given their liberal display the evening before, but it became far more satisfying experience because the action ceased to be an act, and became for them a natural interaction. Gone was the audience, the only thing that mattered was their two bodies held close, and feeling the other.

Gaara didn't need his sensitive neck to be stroked to purr this time, and his fingers curled against his newly dubbed husband's bare shoulders. The taste of Gaara's mouth had a calming effect on Naruto, and he forgot his previous fears. He went back to stroking Gaara's back, marveling at how nice it was to cradle his best friend in his arms like there was where he belonged.

The sudden opening of Naruto's front door, unfortunately, broke the spell.

The Jinchuuriki and the newcomer stared at each other, all surprised and unprepared for such a situation.

"Sakura," Naruto greeted, after he had gathered his wits. He hoped she didn't notice the lingering effects of the Kyuubi in the rough quality of his voice.

"Um," The medic-nin blushed. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to intrude." She glanced at Gaara, whose expression was quickly changing from a happy daze to a murderous glare. "But Tsunade-sama sent me."

Naruto's eyebrows came together. He would have thought the old hag would be half-way to the nearest casino by now, considering she no longer had a noble image to uphold. "What for?"

Sakura extended her arm awkwardly, and two metal shapes dangled from the small ring she held. "Her wedding gift. She meant to give it to you last night, but she got... distracted." In other words, the Godaime had been gloriously smashed. "She had all of the gifts you left at the party forwarded there, and it's already furnished so you only have to worry about bringing your important belongings."

"Huh?" Naruto replied articulately. "What are you talking about?"

Gaara smacked Naruto's shoulder to get his attention. "A house, Naruto. Tsunade-sama is giving us a house."

"WHAT!"

"Not just a house, actually," Sakura interjected, looking proud to deliver this bit of information. "An estate. It's been the property of the government for several years, but the last motion Tsunade made as Hokage was to secure it for you two."

"An estate!"

"A small one, perhaps— but there's plenty of room for two."

"Baa-chan gave us an estate! Sugoi!" Naruto took Gaara by the shoulders and shook him. "Do you know what this means?"

The redhead stared at his ecstatic husband. "I won't have to put up with your smelly apartment?"

"No! Well, that, too— but I'm _rich_!"

Gaara blinked at him. "Well, of course you are. You married me."

"Huh?"

"Why do you think Kazekage runs in our family? Money makes some essential political connections."

"Whatever! But this means I can have a HUGE garden!" He ran to the window to stoop over the potted monstrosity he liked to call, "Whitney! You can live in real dirt now!" And he turned to Stephan, the fickle gardenia. "And you can live in real sunlight!"

Gaara and Sakura stared as Naruto continued to flit from plant to plant, eventually running to the kitchen to have a lengthy conversation with Gabby, the loquacious aloe plant.

"I didn't realize the plants were that important to him." Sakura ventured, uncomfortable with starting a conversation with the unfriendly redhead, but getting even more nervous about the fact they were alone in their silence.

Gaara spared her a glance, and shrugged.

Suppressing her anger over the snub, Sakura felt her duty to be conversational fulfilled.

Several minutes later, with his rounds complete, Naruto skidded back into the living room. "We should go there! Right now!"

"Um, well," Sakura blinked at the hyper blonde. "Don't you want to go to the office first? I mean, it's your first day as a—" she glanced at Gaara with a blush. "married couple, so your absence would be understood... but it is also your first day as Hokage, and I thought!"

"Oh my Kami!"

Both redheads jumped as Naruto exploded with a scream.

"I forgot!" And he disappeared with another dizzying burst of energy.

Sakura blinked, and sent the ex-Kazekage a questioning glance. "Um... what—"

"Okay!" And Naruto appeared on the scene again, fully clothed in his Hokage robes. "Konoha! Here comes Uzumaki Naruto! Rokudaime Hokage!" His intent now obvious, Naruto made a motion for the door, before spinning with a sudden thought, and pulling his wife in for a quick hug. "You can go straight to the estate, and get comfortable. I'll stop by around lunch time, 'kay?"

Said wife barely had time to nod understanding before the Hokage was out the door with an enthusiastic battle cry.

Both redheads stood frozen for several moments, taking the time to recover from the disorienting ball of energy that was Uzumaki Naruto.

"Um... okay..." Sakura said at last, giving Gaara a wary look. "Well, I guess I'll just show you where it is, so you can start moving your stuff out of the apartment."

Hate her though he might, Gaara gave his nod to let her take the lead.

* * *

It was a busy first day for the Rokudaime Hokage. It was all he had expected— paperwork, mission debriefings, the handling of endless ninja-related complaints and requests— he just hadn't realized how _much_ there was. Konoha was a big city, and more than four dozen ninja were on their way in or out every day— all of which the Hokage had to keep track of. And that didn't include the long term upper level missions he had to be constantly updated on, and the numerous lower level missions of genin and chuunin he had to manage that occurred within the village walls.

His only relief was that the Council was, fortunately, unusually silent.

It was dark, however, by the time Naruto realized how much time had passed, mostly thanks to the awakening of his empty stomach.

Guiltily remembering his promise to visit Gaara at midday, Naruto rushed back to his apartment.

Only to find it empty.

Most of his furniture was still there. The smelly futon couch still stood solitarily in the middle of his living room, the dying refrigerator still gurgled in the kitchen, and his bedroom was still host to a lopsided, creaky bed and a beaten dresser. But the entire place was devoid of what had made it home for so long— his clothes, his pictures, his plants, and— more recently— his wife.

Of course, Gaara was the practical type who hated to lie around when there was something to be done. He must have spent his entire day moving their belongings into their new home— the only problem was that Naruto had no idea where that place was.

That situation quickly resolved itself, however, when Naruto ventured near one of the open windows. Gaara's scent was on the sill, and strong enough that he had either climbed over it repeatedly, or had sat there for a long time— and all very recently.

Following an idea, Naruto climbed out onto the roof, and grinned as the distinct odor of his redhead found him there, too.

What a thoughtful spouse he had, to walk the same path each trip so as to leave a scent trail strong enough that Naruto didn't even need to put his nose to the ground to follow it.

The path took him through the upscale part of town, past the Hyuuga, the Inuzuka, and finally the Akamichi estates, but after that Naruto found himself among the very old, very tall trees that marked the edge of Konoha. There was a partially overgrown path, which had once been a very nice pebble stone ambulation, he was sure, but was now pockmarked and weedy. The eastern façade of the Hokage mountain ran along beside it; Naruto could see it through the trees and undergrowth only a few yards away. He was sure Gaara would like that, being reminiscent of the sheer cliffs of his home village.

The gate came upon him as a surprise. Almost as tall as the trees around it, and covered in creeping plant life, it blended with the forest.

One part of it stood out shiny and new: a name plate, "Uzumaki." Pausing for a moment, Naruto imagined what would be behind the barrier. He got the impression that it was old, and had been neglected for a long time— it figured that Tsunade would give them a fixer-upper as a wedding gift. That woman just didn't hand out easy passes.

Gaara had obviously already begun with the fixing part, as all the dirt and weeds had been cleared from the path near the door, allowing it to rotate smoothly when Naruto pressed a hand to it.

Beyond the door was exactly what Naruto had expected— a somewhat dilapidated, and certainly outdated gathering of small buildings. It was easy to imagine the beauty it had been, however, even with weeds choking the rows of fountains, stone statues crumbling on their pedestals, and the veneer peeling off the traditional houses. It was the very image of abandonment.

Naruto was grinning suddenly. Besides the ugliness of ill repair the place had a certain beauty that was both familiar and irrefutable. The plants, bolding growing beyond the gardens they were intended for, provided a vibrance that cut through the picture of decay, and an invasion of wild flowers splashed the lively green with enough bright colors to make even Naruto squint.

He liked the place already. It needed a little work— like the stagnant water in the fountains definitely had to be drained if they didn't want to be eaten by mosquitoes, but the gardens were in a perfect state of disarray that spoke directly to Naruto's tastes.

The further into the compound he traveled, the more diffuse Gaara's trail became, but it wasn't hard to find the redhead himself.

Only one building had been cleaned, a small one near the end of the front courtyard. Naruto's plants lined the porch in their incongruous pots, and he smiled to see they had each been delivered safely.

Leaving his sandals outside, Naruto slid open the antique papered door.

Gaara turned, yawning a greeting.

Naruto grinned wider, focusing immediately on the redhead, who was reclining next to a pot-bellied woodstove on an over-cushioned chaise lounge. "Silly, it's practically summer! We don't need a fire."

Gaara stretched, arching off his pile of pillows with another yawn. "But I chose this house _for_ the woodstove."

Naruto closed the door— which nearly jumped out of its skids— with a chuckle. "Well, you certainly didn't choose it for the door'ttebayo."

"Yeah, it falls off it you're not careful."

"What! Geez, that old hag couldn't have given us a place that _isn't_ falling apart?"

Gaara rubbed at his eyes. "Hm... I kinda like it, though."

Naruto walked across the room to sit next to him, noticing as he went how the recently swept floor was made of bare wood, smoothed by the feet of an age past. "Yeah... me, too."

The fire bathed his front in warmth as he drew close, and Naruto was forced to pull at the neck of his heavy robes. "Geez, it's hot in here. How can you stand it?"

"I'm used to it." Gaara blinked up at him sleepily from his precarious pile of pillows, the dark circles on his face softened by the pressing heat.

"You look tired."

"I always look tired."

"Well yeah, but... You didn't have to wear yourself out, y'know, if you had waited for me, I would have helped with all the moving."

Gaara shrugged, and Naruto's eyes were drawn to the delicate shift of his collarbone under the skin of his throat, glowing a welcoming golden in the dim light.

"You hungry?" he pulled his eyes up to meet Gaara's gaze— those eyes which were watching him with patient calm. "'Cuz I'm hungry."

"Hm... I bought taiyaki today." Gaara's eyes shifted to indicate their location. "But I couldn't finish... portions are so large in Konoha."

Quick to fetch the promising foam carton, but even quicker to return to the fireside, having gotten used to the heat, Naruto's stomach rumbled in expectation. "Sweet! They're still warm! Eh? Gaara! There's still six in here!"

"They gave me eight... even though I'm sure I paid for four. But they're even bigger than they make them in Suna."

"Hee hee..." What was once six soon became three.

"But I've never really been able to finish by myself, anyway... Temari and Kankurou are horrible food thieves."

"Fishy, fishy..."

Gaara sighed in annoyance. "You could at least _pretend_ to listen to me, you know."

"Mm wissening!" Naruto proclaimed around a waffley fin.

"And I don't think I could even imagine you to exhibit some form of good manners." Gaara rolled his eyes away from Naruto's stuffed cheeks.

After a painful swallow, Naruto replied with a mocking grin. "But I don't think I would have any trouble imagining you in a dress'ttebayo!"

Gaara threw a pillow at him. "What kind of comeback is that! It's completely off the point I was trying to make!"

Naruto opted for protecting what was left of the taiyaki over dodging the pillow. "But it certainly got the appropriate reaction, ne?" He giggled maniacally. "Isn't that all a comeback needs?"

Huffing in annoyance, Gaara fought the urge to throw another pillow— he needed those for comfort. "Well, you better get really good with that imagination of yours, because you're never seeing me in a dress again anywhere but your dreams."

"What!" Gaara was somewhat surprised when Naruto started to whine— he hadn't thought the reaction he'd be getting out of the blonde would be disappointment. "Why not?"

He had been hoping Naruto would share his feelings when it came to cross-dressing, despite all the teasing. Then again— he _had_ been the one to develop the gender-bending Oroike no jutsu. "I just... I'm not comfortable with it."

Naruto paused, and Gaara had trouble deciphering the purpose of the consideration in his look. "Not comfortable?" he prompted at last.

Gaara squirmed, unsure if he was stepping over a line or not— Naruto could be unpredictable even to him sometimes. "It's not that it's _women's_ clothing... I just— I mean, I don't mind being—" Exasperated, Gaara set his jaw. "I don't like the breeze!"

Blue eyes blinking, Naruto stared at him for a moment before abruptly snorting. "The breeze! You're from friggin' _Wind_ Country!"

"That's irrelevant!" Gaara proclaimed hotly in defense. "In the desert, I wore pants!"

"Even so— there's way more _breeze_ there than on a sunny day in Konoha!"

Gaara's face was burning hotter than the furnace next to him. Normally unaffected by such things— Naruto's teasing touched Gaara more intimately than anyone else's, just like the rest of what Naruto did. "It's just... I felt naked."

"Naked!" Naruto laughed louder. "You were wearing more layers yesterday than ever before— and with you, that's really saying something!"

"Shut up..." Gaara growled, and rolled away from Naruto's guffaws. He spent the next couple minutes like that, his back to the blonde, and his face getting progressively hotter under the direct force of the stove.

Two more taiyaki later, and Naruto's laughter had been absent for a while. His voice was even half-way serious when he called for Gaara's attention. "Hey— Gaara."

The redhead huffed obstinately, even though his eyes were dry from the heat and his back was cold.

"Gaara!"

"What?" He twisted so he could give the blonde a glare.

But Naruto just grinned, the new softness in his eyes assuaging even Gaara's ire. "You can wear whatever you want, y'know. I wouldn't have cared if you showed up to the wedding in a clown suit."

"A clown?" Gaara held onto his anger as well as he could, but his defenses were not made to withstand Naruto's earnest kindness. "Is that what you think of me?"

"No! Of course not! You wouldn't even be funny in a clown suit... kind of creepy, actually—"

"Creepy!"

Naruto chuckled, shaking his head as if to the silly gallivanting of a child. "Maybe to other people, but not to me. But you gotta admit— you'd be creepy to _anyone_ in a clown suit'ttebayo."

Gaara rolled fully around to face him, giving Naruto his scrutiny. "You don't think I'm creepy?"

"Naw." Naruto's wink befuddled him, before he placed it as a friendly gesture associated with confidence— Kankurou had explained it to him once. "A long time ago, maybe. But now? You're the un-creepiest guy I know."

Propping himself on his elbow, Gaara was pleased, but refused to show it. "Temari insisted I wear the dress. She said you'd like it."

Naruto scratched at his whisker marks, eyes suddenly finding everything but Gaara interesting. "I did like it. Dattebayo."

Eyebrows coming together, Gaara asked, "Is that why you are so perturbed by my dislike of it? You... like it when I wear women's clothing?"

Naruto chuckled briefly, but it was more nervous than a humorous release. "It's not that— well, not _really_."

He was quiet for a long time, as Gaara continued to look at him expectantly. "Then what is it _really_?" Gaara prompted at last.

Sighing, Naruto looked straight at him before answering. "It made it... easier. It felt more— more normal."

"Me in a wedding dress is more normal." Gaara reiterated skeptically.

"No! That's not what I—" Naruto scratched at his whiskers, blue eyes in turmoil. "It's just, I've had this dream all my life— well, not all my life, but for a really long time— and... you're not a girl, y'know?"

"Biologically speaking—"

"Yeah, yeah! Biologically whatever, I don't care. What I'm saying is... keeping at least a part of that dream, even if everything else—" Naruto waved his hands at the length of Gaara's body. "is different. It's easier."

Gaara bit his lip, feeling that familiar fear grow again. Would loneliness hound him even here? "Are you saying... I cannot be a part of that dream?"

Naruto blinked at him uncomprehendingly for a moment, before grinning suddenly. "Gaara, you _are_ the dream. It's just a little different. It's the changing it that's hard."

Now Gaara was confused. "I'm the dream?"

"Yeah, version two-point-Oh'ttebayo."

"Naruto, that makes no sense."

The blonde just laughed, as if that was the punch line. "Maybe. But to me— I think I've figured it out. I never needed a girl in the first place— just someone. And you're way more than just someone'ttebayo."

The furnace burned hot on his back, but could not compare to the sudden flare in Gaara's chest. Gaara may have been lost as to the meaning of Naruto's words, but the message was clear: he was special. "You need me?"

Naruto scratched his cheek, blushing shyly, but there was a directness in his gaze that spoke of his utmost confidence in his words. "Yeah, Gaara. Just like becoming Hokage, you're part of my dream."

Gaara knew how important the Hokage position was to Naruto— it was something he had ranted about almost constantly since his childhood. The idea that Gaara stood even on equal ground with that ambition in Naruto's heart sent a giddy flutter through his ribcage.

He stared at this man— his best friend, Uzumaki Naruto, Rokudaime Hokage, fellow Jinchuuriki, husband— who needed him. Who wanted him badly enough to pledge a lifetime to him.

And within himself, Gaara realized with a little gasp a new sort of need arising. It was no secret that Gaara needed Naruto on many levels. He had been the one to pull him back from the brink of insanity in his childhood, and to subsequently hold that hard-won clarity together for him throughout his difficult years as Kazekage in a hostile political environment. He had even needed Naruto to save his life on some occasions, and in a certain case, to give it back.

His need for Naruto already so great and varied— be it emotional, spiritual, mortal, social, or whatever— Gaara was relatively unsurprised when Naruto's heartfelt words awoke in him a need of a different variety. He should have realized it was there all along really, what with the shivery delight he had discovered in Naruto's arms only that morning and the night before, but only now did it rear its head prominently enough for Gaara, as inexperienced as he was with such things, to recognize it.

So Gaara did the only thing he could manage— he fulfilled that newly acknowledged need, and to do so he climbed down into his blonde's lap and kissed the living daylights out of him.


End file.
